Tag Archives: saqlain mushtaq

Dirty Dirk in the toilet at Lord’s

I should say he wasn’t actually in the toilet at Lord’s, but he was in there via this picture.

Forget for a moment that Dirk looks like he would rather be anywhere else than the photo shoot.

And even forget that Lebara have found the cheapest no name shirts they could for the ad, and think about what this could have been.

It is placed above the piss troughs at the grounds, it should be Dirk with a shit eating grin on his face, pointing his camera down like he is taking a picture of your cock, while Vaas and Saqlain kick the shit out of someone in a chicken suit in the back ground.

Some people just don’t have the flare for advertising that we do.

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Saqlain V2

Saqlain Mushtaq has made a test century.

Unless you have, which I am assuming you haven’t, you can’t know the blood, perspiration, mental strength and balls it takes to make a test century against New Zealand in Christchruch.

Apparently it takes at least 291 balls.

That was the old (Pakistani) Saqlain.

He is gone.

Now we have the new (English) Saqlain.

This model comes with a resplendent beard.

The Pakistani model couldn’t even grow a soul patch.

The reason I am talking about the old and the new, is that I just saw the new Saqlain try and slog his first ball out of the park when his team just wanted 5 runs to get the bonus point.

One of those bonus points they wanted so bad, they offered Shoaib a trip to sunny England.

It seems the new Saqlain is more Pakistani than the old Saqlain.

Which seems odd to me.

The conventional school of thought is that going to England makes you more conservative and plain.

For the godfather of the doosra, England is a place to lose his innihitions, get free and freaky.

Slogging wildly when his team needs him to button in.

Also growing one hell of a beard.

Not quite a Dirty Dirk beard, but still.

Surrey got the bonus point, although you couldn’t say he had much to do with it.

He did make 4, then his leg stump took a holiday.

The new Saqlain did entertain me.

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dirty dirk, supervillians and a really good english spinner

I got some things to say that won’t make a full days news.

The Herald Sun, Murdochs flag ship Australian paper ran a full article on Dirty Dirk Nannes today.

They offcourse didn’t refer to him as Dirty.

Well Herald Sun, I wrote my profile without any research on the 14th of January, 5 days before your Michael Horan produced his.

In fact I first wrote about him on the 14th of November. I didn’t wait until i had facts or he won the 2020 championship to write about him.

Another great name has come to my attention.

Albie Morkel.

He is a south African all rounder, so he is bound to be a disappointment.

His brother, who has played a test has an even better name.

Morne Morkel.

Sounds like a super villain, I can see him stroking his white cat as I write this.

Sacqlain Mushtaq has always been my favourite finger spinner.

The famous test where he destroyed Australia in the first innings in Hobart was out standing. Unfortunately in the second innings Gilly continually put him out of the ground.

I’m not really a huge fan of watching finger spinners, unless they are @ss clowns like Tufnell, Symcox or Matthews. But from the first moment I saw Saqlain Mushtaq I liked him.

Let us not forget he all but invented the doosra, before the doosra became a split personality and took him over like Tyler Durden.

Then he disappeared and I was sad, but now he is back and wants to play for England, and I am happy.

Mind you i have know about this for quite a long time, because my friend at King Cricket is always on the ball. Respect Homey.

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