Tag Archives: mark ramprakash

New Surrey Post

I know, it’s been ages, I’m sorry – I’ve been distracted. And, to be honest, I’ve been waiting for Ramps’ hundredth hundred.

In the end I got so tired of waiting that I wrote a post about how he hasn’t got his hundredth hundred yet. It’s RIGHT HERE.

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mark butcher emails me

He really does.

Read here for full Butcher related email news.

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When a hundred means you’ve failed

Disclaimer: If you’re a Surrey fan, you may want to switch off now.

Mark Ramprakash played 52 tests.

The same as Don Bradman.

Bradman just pipped him in the number of centuries made.

By 27.

Ramprakash made 2 in 52 tests at an average of 27.

For younger readers, this may be confusing, as surely a team as well oiled and professional as England wouldn’t allow a man to dance his way to such a bad record.

But they did.

The thing is everyone knows Ramps can bat, especially Ramps.

One hundred came against Warne, Lee, Dizzy and McGrath (flat pitch not withstanding).

The other against Ambrose, Walsh, Bishop and the great Nixon McClean.

Now he has been stuck on 99 first class hundreds for the last few weeks, English county fans are on the edge of their cups of tea in anticipation.

I have always thought making 100 first class hundreds is a failure.

There have been players like Grace and Gooch who did it while being very good test players.

The last man to do it was Graeme Hick, the man that Merv Hughes ruined, who batted at test level like an undecided lemming.

Had Ramps and Hick had 12 year test careers, like they both had the talent to, they would never had reached 100 first class hundreds mountain top.

Who among us would rather make be a statistical anomaly, than a fixture of their countries middle order?

When Ramps reaches this milestone, there will be a lot of head nodding, back slapping and praise for this dancing man.

But for some of us, we will see this as his ultimate failure.

Ofcourse his wife may think he’s had bigger failures.

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Boring Boring Surrey

As the English ladyblogger, I’ll be bringing you occasional little snippets about the English county season. Today’s item tells you all you need to know about Surrey’s Friends Provident 50-over game with Kent on Monday 5 May. If you find the post boring, it’ll be because I’m trying to give you an accurate impression of the game.

Throughout the day, I kept asking myself this: watching boring cricket is better than being at work, but is it better than being at home? I love cricket, any cricket (this is a person who once subscribed to Zee for a YEAR just to watch one Sri Lanka – Bangladesh test series). But yesterday’s game turned out to be one of the more turgid days of cricket that I can remember. Now, the word “turgid” can be used in a few contexts, one of which is potentially exciting, another of which is boring. This was the boring one.

Kent put up a total of 282, which, after a slow start was, to be fair, not turgid. But then Surrey’s first few wickets fell very quickly (as did Kent’s actually) but Surrey has a much longer tail, so from then on it was all very “stab me with a spoon PLEASE” as the result of the game (Surrey lose by 90) was no longer in any doubt. Sometimes in such matches the English weather colludes to provide interest by adding the extra frisson of the Duckworth-Lewis target, but today Surrey were 100 runs behind the D/L target at the 25 over stage, plus the weather was gorgeous. Bloody English weather, ruining a match again. Although it was nice to be able to bring out my second-nicest Birkenstocks. Not my nicest pair, mind; that’s gold and sparkly so was a bit too IPL for yesterday’s outfit.

Mark Ramprakash: at the matches I’ve seen him at this season, he’s scored 0 and 5. Ramps, honey, if I’m putting you off, just say so, and I’ll stay at home.

The DJ playing music for every boundary was twiddling his thumbs for most of the day. This was no excuse, though, for the repeated cruel taunting of possible England hopefuls Rob Key and Ramps with “Don’t stop thinking about tomorrow” and then the line “Yesterday’s gone, yesterday’s gone”. He did play “Brown Eyed Girl” a few times, and also a song which is my middle name, and I like to think that both were just for me.

Overseas Player Who Caught My Eye: It was almost Justin Kemp, for playing the same falling-over-doing-the-splits shot twice, and then employing the same move while fielding, but he was pipped by Pedro Collins. I’m definitely voting for Pedro (not least because he’s given me yet another idea for a cricket t-shirt). He’s called Pedro, and is also the half-brother of Fidel Edwards. He took a respectable 4 – 49 off his 10 overs, and SMASHED his previous FP Trophy high score of one not out by reaching the magical land of double figures plus 100% strike rate with 11 off 11. But he mostly caught my eye by running out to bat at number 11 with a skip and spring in his step.

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