There was Lionel Ritchie singing with his microphone turned down. And other western acts.
Some drag queen dancing acts, except with the drag queens.
Bollywood stuff seemed to be happening as well.
Costumes that some people were comparing to klu klux klan on twitter.
Then Ravi yelled.
Andy Bichel did some commentary, he sounded like Danny Morrison on ketamine.
Lalit was missing most of the time, but in his place was a lady in a red dress, an obvious homage to the Matrix.
Brad Hodge looked pissed off.
Many snatch shots of the cheerleaders, none on super slow mo, maybe next year.
Angelo Mathews continues to not exist.
The Chargers song was remixed, still shit though.
Owais Shah had cut down his sleeves to show off the guns.
There were time outs, but they weren’t strategically named, but they were strategically used.
The IPL has ads between the balls, they are louder and less awkward than the Channel 9 versions.
ITV brought out Hoggard, Hick and some dude and some Indian chick for their coverage. Hoggy was ok, the rest were ordinary and only the Indian chick had done any research.
Gilly seemed to keep hitting the ball in the air and not getting caught.
I never thought I’d say this, but I wanted fake smiles from SRK.
Rohit Sharma continues to vie for Indian batsmen most likely to be assassinated.
The game fizzled out.
The Windies beat Zimbabwe.
The IPL has started, not with a bang, not with a whimper, but with a carefully stage managed event that had shit western acts, lots of dancing, two teams making decent totals and Andy Bichel.