solo steyn

The ICC has dangled promotion from everywhere in Sri Lanka.

There are probably a few people in Hambantota who have changed their name to World T20 for the duration of the tournament.

The most ubiquitous promotion is that of the various star players in three poses with a drum anchoring them to the ground.

The drum signifies the ICC.

The players included in this promotion are mostly batsmen, or all rounders. Ross Taylor, Shahid Afridi, Chris Gayle, Ab De Villiers, Shakib Al Hasan, and Shane Watson.

Stuart Broad and Lasith Malinga are the only real bowlers included.

Dale Steyn has no poster.

DALE STEYN has no poster.

No poster.

It’s Dale fucken Steyn, ABD is nice, and likeable, sings pseudochristian motivational tunes and has a face that could sell baby oil, but he’s not Steyn.

There is only one Steyn in the entire world. And I don’t care if this is a batting tournament, he deserves his own stupid promotion poster.

Steyn had bowled two overs for seven, been the only player to make Watson look human, looked too good for Warner and given South African fans the sort of false hope that religious leaders often give.

Steyn just has the perfect controlled menace about him, you know he wants to hurt you, you know he will try and hurt you, and you know he can hurt you, it’s just whether you can hide in the cupboard while he looks in the attic.

This tournament is not about fast bowlers, but for two glorious overs we saw Steyn stalk the Aussies, and even Watson had to hide in the cupboard.

Then Steyn left, and Watson was Watson.

Morkel fell apart, Kallis looked old and tired, Botha and Petersen were harmless and Parnell became the new Albie. Steyn had two overs to win the match, by the time he came back on it was all over, as was their tournament.

At the very least the man deserves a fucking promotional poster.

Result: Watson is an extremely large gorilla and South Africa have some time to prepare for the Champion’s league.

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2 thoughts on “solo steyn

  1. Gabby says:

    They are yet to design a pitch on which that man can’t bowl well.

  2. Nick says:

    I still think Shane Bond was better bolwer :P

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