Duncan Fletcher saves Indian cricket with Ashley Giles

Duncan Fletcher’s first speech as Indian coach:

“For too long India have picked spin bowlers with guile and skill.  It’s a terrible trait that will never last in the long run.

Guile and skill are fine as a surprise tactic, but for long term success you need someone who will literally add little to your team other than work ethic and a sensible haircut.

Other lesser cricket coaches may have needed these surprise tactics to win some tests, but I don’t need them.  What I need is bowlers who bowl 90mph plus and spinners who are really more there for team morale.

Spinners shouldn’t be eccentric or the main part of your attack.  They are there because they are smart enough to gently roll their fingers and occasionally bowl defensive legside tactics.

India have never understood this, and that is why I have requested that they pick Ashley Giles their tour to England.

From what I understand there are some administration details that still need to be smoothed out, but this will go through. Or I’ll write some self important columns in newspapers to embarrass those who don’t allow it.

I love India, and I think their team is ok.  However, players like Sachin and Virender can learn something from Ashley, here is a man who made it to the top level of cricket simply because no one ever noticed he existed. Unlike them he didn’t use talent, he just never turned up late to a training session and always helped put out the cones.

That’s what India needs from their spinners.

Forget doosras, teesras and carrom balls, India needs gentle roll from a invisible team player.

Actually, you don’t even need me here, just get Ashley in, he’s in just as good of form as he was when he played.

I’d like to be a rugby consultant. I have some ideas…I love my rugby, I would rather watch rugby than cricket. I’m passionate about it, it’s the game I’d like to have been involved in.

Does India have a rugby team?”


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15 thoughts on “Duncan Fletcher saves Indian cricket with Ashley Giles

  1. Crownish says:

    All he needs to do is get Harbhajan to bowl left handed then

  2. golandaaz says:

    A shockingly uninspiring choice….

  3. George says:

    You get paid millions to come up with a choice as uninspired as this. Fucking cunts!

    Fletcher is old and his coaching style is tactical, pulling off wins by a side not very talented. Tactical wins – Ashley giles, Pontings ’05 run out etc

    India is a side brimming with talent. I doubt Fletcher is capable of nuturing a team. Forget about succession planning altogether
    England got stomped like a roach when Vaughan moved out. How the hell is he going to plan for Tendulkar, Laxman and Dravid. On the surface Pujara, Vijay, Badrinath, Raina all look promising but dont come close to replacing the whole unit.
    The two year contract will end about the time the three old men hang up their boots. I fear the worst.

    We should have picked from one of Fleming or Warne. You just have to look at what Fleming did to develop an average spinner like Vettori into a top three bowler and a top three all rounder. Warne, if he can keep his dick in his pants, is the most inspirational cricketer I have seen. That 99 semifinal, what he did with a mediocre IPL team, and his overall criketing brain all would make for one hell of a coach.

  4. George says:

    sorry jarrod, I read your entry after I wrote my response. I was seething pissed when I read the news and had to blurt out what I thought.

    now, after reading what you wrote, I see you’ve pretty much said the same thing. apologies.

  5. India Trivia says:

    Fletcher is the chap who dumped Swann in the wilderness for about 7 years (?). Overly strict disciplinarians and inflexible/stubborn egotists will not fit the mould for India. The Indian team is filled with head-strong kids who will need firm yet understanding handling. I don’t see Fletcher being that type of guy. I’d have preferred to see him more in the role that Dav Whatmore currently occupies, i.e., unearthing and nurturing young talent.

    As for Rugby, while India only has an amateur rugby team, we do have a solid connection with Rugby by way of the Calcultta Cup :)

  6. chowkster says:

    This is crap

  7. chowkster says:

    I mean Fletcher appointment. Your blog is fine, Jrod.

  8. Sagar says:

    Fletcher is an ‘interesting’ choice…i think most people who are doing his bio’s are adapting the same stance Andy Zaltzman follows regarding the 06-07 ashes drubbing…like it never happened.

    If Fletcher can’t do a Kirsten, may he do a Chappel, so we can unearth another Kirsten :-)

    P.S – On another note, would love to hear your views on the Malcolm Speed book – Sticky Wicket…it would be nice to hear an aussie pov on speed’s rants.

  9. sahas says:

    This appointment will soon make the Greg Chappel affair look like a fairy tale :-)

  10. Govind Raj says:

    Fletcher is there because of two things. He was the English Coach when they beat the West Indies in West Indies and he knows England. These are out next two opponents. He may not be available for the Caribbean tour. But it will be practically India-B playing there.

    Ultimately he is a stop gap Coach. Perhaps to bring in a younger guy like Fleming.

  11. I am assuming, Duncan Fletcher won’t have any power to choose/select any players or will have much say on playing XI. So, it shouldn’t matter much. He might be useful to give advice to players during India’s visit to England. Will be fun series.

  12. Fletcher is probably going to have to oversee the end of Tendulkar, Laxman and Dravid from the test team, how he handles the ‘Sachin situation’ will be interesting.

    For these reasons and the fact that India are world champions and test ranked No.1, I think he is on a hiding to nothing here, he must know this, but I would imagine the job offer was to good to turn down.

  13. kaprashoo says:

    you fucking racist cunt.

    i will be posting this comment in all your subsequent articles cos that’s what we chippy darkies usually resort to. mike selvey never lies

    (it will be really funny.
    in my head.)

  14. Greta Reas says:

    Damien Martyn was single-handedly hounded out of cricket by AG. Everyone knows that. You sicken me sometimes. I’d like to live in Duncan’s wattle-flaps.

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