Bring back Greg Matthews

I could come up with many reasons why Greg Matthews, the man I spent my youth baiting at the G, should come back to the Australian team.

It could be his relationship with cricket with balls’ smooth eddie cowan, when Eddie played with Greg, not the other way around, at Sydney University.

It could be that according to wikipedia Matthews took Phil Jaques’ wicket when he played Sunderland not that long ago.

Or it could be the fact I had a beer with him (in as much as anyone can have a beer with Matthews) today.

The real reason is that if Australia are going to play like this, they might as well do it with proper entertaining cricketers.

During my youth I despised Matthews, but he was the most entertaining player I ever saw.

He was not just a cricketer, but a vaudeville act out on the ground. He seemed to be involved with several conversations at one time, a few of those with himself.

If he didn’t get wickets, or even worse, he did, it really didn’t matter to us because we just loved the way he played the game.

Sure, you could say that he might be better than Doherty and Hauritz, he might even be better than a genetically spliced version of Xavier Hauritz, but that means nothing.

Australia aren’t that good, and Matthews isn’t going to make this team great, but he will make them watchable.

For many reasons.

There is the thrill of the come back, he could be cricket’s very own Kenny Powers.

Then there is the brilliant crazy nature of the man, the spinning comedian.

And then there is the simple thing that people would be interested in Australian spin again.

Australian spin is in such a boring state that I don’t even write about it anymore, writing about it causes sudden blackouts.

Matthews would change that.

He’d get people talking about it, without making the team any worse.

And if he doesn’t want to come back, why not pick Tiger Bill O’Reilly, you could get Warnie to operate him like a puppeteer, Channel 9 could make a series out of it, Weekend at Tiger’s.

People like Puppets.

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13 thoughts on “Bring back Greg Matthews

  1. Sunny says:

    i bet he would be wearing a jumper too in this adelaide heat.

  2. golandaaz says:

    Australia needs to enjoy the joys of ineptitude but they take their cricket too seriously

  3. Nathan says:

    Who the fuck are we sending out onto that pitch? In all the years of my life watching cricket (admittedly not exactly a massive long count), I have NEVER seen an Australian outfit so bloody feckless either at home or away.

  4. ghurram says:

    I don’t carry an australian passport. JRod – am from your clan of leg spinners, and I guess you should be giving a shot at that post now.

    Too many freeloaders – X, North,

  5. Matt says:

    That was the most boring days cricket I’ve ever seen at the ol Adelaide oval.

    Bring back tim may, I saw him take 5/9 against the windies here

  6. sumit uprety says:

    As an Indian fan, one thing I used to admire abt Aussie cricket was its no passenger attitude to team selection. Wat happened to it. Looks like half the side is passengers and tthat too ticketless.

  7. Wes ~PFCNFS~ says:

    Big question mark hovering over my head… what’s the point of zombifying oneself for weeks watching people stuffing up in the bright sunshine… one could watch a Shield match instead, or, sleep

  8. […] Bring back Greg Matthews — Cricket With Balls […]

  9. nashy says:

    What happened to you Jrod?
    Advocating a NSWman ahead of CWB’s Nice Bryce? I never thought I would see the day

  10. poopsie says:

    A few questions as I cannot view any actual footage of this test:

    1. Would Scott Muller perform better than these guys?
    2. Would Matthews gain preference over Peter McIntyre for the vacant spin spot?
    3. Would Gavin Robertson and Richard Chee Quee quit the band and become the next Air Supply?

    Doherty and North rest in peace, the WACA will hardly notice you are not there

  11. The Pav says:


    If you spent your “yoof” baiting Mathews then clearly, contrary to other indications, you di not have “a mis-spent youth”

    I guess we’re finding out what it’s been like to play Australia over the “Warne / McGrath” era

    Hoe Come ACA haven’t signed McGrath on as a bowling coach instead of a loser like Cooley?

  12. Suprise says:

    MacGilla would eat Matthews for dinner with a nice chianti or for that matter any red from the Barossa.

  13. Sunny says:

    yeah…is mcgill around? sure he bowled some 4 balls but atleast he took wickets.

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