catches, what are they good for?

On flat pitches cricket can be hard for the fielding team.  England found it hard yesterday.  Australia found it hard today.

What makes cricket harder is dropping catches.

There is a cliché that you’ve heard about catches winning matches, and it’s days like yesterday and today that make old guys who know less than fuck all about cricket go all serious while they stroke their chins and say it.

I hate those guys.

There were no easy catches for Australia, but there were three catches that professional international cricketers should take.

Mitchell had the high hard one, not just from the crowd afterwards.  Strauss tried a stupid shot out of the footmarks and hit it straight to Johnson who dropped in and then fell to the ground like he was doing a experimental dance performance.

Siddle took a while to see Cook’s top edge, and by the time he did his hand was just getting to the ball as it hit the ground.  Then he got up limping and flexing, just what Australia needed.

Clarke dived to his left to pick up a wayward cutshot from Trott and took the catch in his fingers, but the strain of his back, failed relationship and the Australian public turning on him, combined with the fact he couldn’t really brace himself, meaning he fumbled the ball.

Australia only got one other chance for the whole day.

Cause you know, as the old man stroking his beard while he searches his brain for a fucking boring cliché would say, they call it test cricket for a reason.

If all those chances were taken, Australia might still be a touch in the shit, but the shit might only be waste high, rather than at mouth level where it is now.

Will they be able to get out of this shit pool of their own making, or will they fecally drown.

Will they “catch” up?

You will only know if you join in for tomorrow’s dramatic climax…


9 thoughts on “catches, what are they good for?

  1. Chris Weston says:

    It’s amazing how many times a dropped catch results in a very temporary ‘tweak’, anger at the drop being assuaged by concern at the injury. I suspect he’s ok.

  2. Dustbinner says:

    Sigh, Jarrod, Sigh.

    And I thought we had this one in the bag.

    I blame Johnson.

    Just because I feel like it.

  3. jogesh99 says:


    Mediocre cricket all around. Truly a battle for the middle spot i the rankings. And great pitch I say, i know you Aussies are so desperate to emulate the Indians, but ….
    You need a Bhajji in the proceedings to at least liven things up.

  4. martin says:

    /I blame Johnson.

    Just because I feel like it./

    I’ve already questioned his mental toughness as a response to a previous blog but here’s my take on him.

    When I was young Australian cricketers had moustaches, not because it was a humourous charidee charabang but because they just did. Lillee, Border, Boon and the mightily moustachioed big Merv grew facial hair because they could and because they were fcukngi good at it. Theirs were not the limp moustaches of benevolent goodwill, rather the soup strainers of proper antipodean men.
    Mitchell Johnson, the slouching, callow, metrosexual is a triumph of style over content and a desgrace to the stereotype of granite hard aussie cricketers. Could you imagine him going toe to toe with Boon on the inflight drinking competition? Could you see him building a fence with Rodney Marsh? No but I bet you can see him wearing guyliner and admiring his own tattoos in a gymnasium mirror while he works out to hi nrg throw-your-hands-in-the-air pop music.
    He has some talent but it’s nothing without application. Geoff Boycott has been laughing at him and insisting that Australia must keep him in the team. You know you have trouble when your opponent starts to regard you with nothing more than contempt.

  5. jogesh99 says:

    Johnson is the Sreesanth of Aussie cricket. if he gets it right, the match is yours. Otherwise, he’s good for letting off steam – Ponting could try slapping him to regain form – hey, maybe he already does – the fags!

    As Andy said on Confec Stall:
    It’s fourth against fifth. Out of, basically, 8.

    So it dont mean a thing beyond the fact that its of course, beloved Test Cricket.

  6. Wes ~PFCNFS~ says:

    Kohli should probably play in the World Cup. He has fire, ambition, youth and skill. I avoid him as much as possible but it’s hopeless, he is always there sticking his talent into your face.

  7. Govind Raj says:

    No Catches
    No Patches
    No Warne
    No Yearn

    If this is Gabba day-4, I pity Australia.

    Why on earth do Australia have to copy India ?

    This pitch is full of Ejaz Butt !

  8. John A says:

    Will they be able to get out of this shit pool of their own making, or will they fecally drown.

    It’s amazing how a day’s cricket can turn the view of the Australian team from world conquering heroes to Z-list losers.

    It must be the beer (or as an alternative to beer, VB).

    I can’t see Australia taking 20 wickets, especially with X Doherty as specialist spinner.

    Here’s what Geoffrey Boycott said about that fourth day

    What a wonderfully uplifting day for England. Andrew Strauss and Alastair Cook batted splendidly and showed there is nothing to fear from this Australian attack.

    Strauss’s footwork and driving were terrific. During this innings Strauss cut the ball over gully, not at it, and the only time he looked like getting out was when he tried to hit the spinners over the top, which he shouldn’t have been doing in the first place.

    Cook played a controlled innings which may have been steadier than his first innings but was much more valuable to England.

    Yesterday all the good fortune went with Mike Hussey and Brad Haddin. Today it was England’s turn. When they played and missed an odd ball or a slightly false shot, Australia could not hang on to the catches. Even when Australia used the review system they got it wrong.

    Mitchell Johnson was a shadow of the bowler he is has been in the past. He dropped a catch, he got nought when he batted and has taken no wickets for more than 100 in the match. His place is in jeopardy. Ricky Ponting’s field placings were also far too defensive for a team trying to win the match.

    The pitch is still very good for batting and there is no reason why England should not save the game, which considering how many times we have lost at Brisbane in the past, is a good start to the series for England.

    I think MJ is in real trouble, because they don’t need a mercurial wunderkind bowling occasionally well, but well all of the time.

    By the way, Finn got 6 wickets and skittled Australia out. MJ used to do that, but he doesn’t do accurate any more. Not even with a moustache

    And Ponting’s captaining career took another step towards the grave. Even with 220 runs in hand, Punter put in defensive fields and let Strauss and Cook play their shots.

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