Has the face of a grizzled character actor in an old irish mob film. When he does curl his face up for a smile, it’s the smile of a man who has seen a lot. Once said he hated the captaincy, then captained England to their first major limited overs title shortly after. Is only good when you bag him, his Sunderland nature cannot handle any praise. When the Queen said good job once, he threw up in her mouth, figuratively. Left twitter after only a short time because people kept saying nice things to him. Probably hates the nick name the Bruce Willis of Nudgers. Bats like he is shovelling coal, or some other menial old timey job involving shovels. It’s never pretty, but he does get some sort of job done. His bowling is a living homage to the military medium pace in New Zealand’s past. Once made a captaincy decision so good that Daniel Vettori said a naughty word.
balls profile: Paul Collingwood