You already know that Sachin Tendulkar is better than you. No matter what your special talent is he’d be better at it. He can juggle Volkswagens while rolling a cigarette without use of his arms.
Today, as we can reveal exclusively, he took his special skills further when he performed perhaps the greatest feat in test cricket, making a hundred at both ends.
While many people claimed to have seen Murali Vijay at the other end, this was actually a hologram. Vijay is class, but he was not even at the Bangalore ground.
Sachin’s trick was necessary because the laws of cricket state that you can’t bat at both ends at once. Sachin, like a young Bruce Wayne, wanted to spice things up a bit. And really, what is cooler than batting at both ends.
Apparently he first decided to do this when seeing Peter George and Nathan Hauritz bowl in tandem yesteryday.
“Sometimes, you can’t rely on the other batsman to get you on strike, but by being at both ends I could face them at all times”.
The trick that was done with Sachin’s special effects company – Tenduklar light and magic – and special consent from the BCCI via text message.
You might say that while Sachin’s batting was good, he has surely played better innings from just one end. It’s true, but batting at both ends is quite tiring after a while.
Most cricketers get tired just batting at one. Plus, all those mid pitch conversations must have been weird.
“Sachin, you are god”.
“No, Sachin, you are god”.
“You’re too kind to say so, but you’re so money and you don’t even know it”.
The ICC are already looking at banning this technology, they’ve consulted Simon Katich and he is against it.
It was originally thought that Australia would be upset over the trick, but when asked, Ponting said, “Really, well, that is weird, but to be honest we probably wouldn’t have got the hologram out today, let alone another batsman. The boys tried really hard though and I hope they can have a big day tomorrow”.
Brad Hogg also discussed it, “Look, Indians really love cricket, and I don’t know what all this talk about telegrams is, but they love their cricket here, I’ll tell you that”.
Sachin and the real MS Dhoni will continue their innings tomorrow.