Andrew Strauss roars, sort of

We’ve had the Australian Ashes ad, with Mitchell as one of the all time best and Keith Miller wrongly omitted.

Now the English are getting in on it with an ad made by Sky.

What Works:

The costumes are not cheap plastic costumes like Strauss wore for some other ad. The medieval helmet and pads are cool, I want some.

Paul Collingwood does actually look like he could star in a b grade green screen sand and sandal epic. Not a speaking part, but just the nuggety looking dude in the back ground who gets shit done, but dies early in the third act.

The lion. Who ever said, let’s get a lion, I like the person, although it would have worked better with Graeme Swann leaning on it eating some bread.

The MCG, if there was ever a place that English cricketers were thrown to the lions.

It’s very camp, and that works in a unintentional comedic way.

What doesn’t:

Ian Botham.  He might seem himself as Oliver Reed, but most of us see him as more Benny Hill these days.  He can’t pull off this speech, and I still have no idea what he is saying.

The goofy shot at the end, Stuart Broad looks like the Jonas Brothers have come on stage, Swann and Colly look like they are reacting to someone say, “come on boys, sly smirk time”.  Why use a facial expression that none of these guys would ever use out on the ground, and also change it from the tough guy facade from earlier. It goes from trying to be a cool guy Ashes ad, to an ad for preperation H (Can you tell which one of these guys had hemorrhoids?).

Why does Strauss wear a helmet at the end, it makes no sense. He has no gloves with him, so wearing a helmet is just wrong.  Plus, why would he be out on the field staring at the stands with two bowlers and a batsman, while wearing a helmet. Also you can’t see his face, why would you hide the face of the captain?  Why, just, why?

Fat man in the corner playing drums, really?

It’s very camp, and that doesn’t work for the general mood of the piece.

The editing seems rushed, in these sort of camp macho scenes (every man has seen thousands of them) the manly tightening of a strap or the slashing of a sword (bat in this case) is done in almost super slow motion, you linger on it, you can feel the metal, the leather, it tightens around you and you get this “lets go to battle” buzz, this one feels more like, lets dress up and listen to the old fart before we get our golf game in.

Stuart Broad, gladiator?

Of these three men, surely only Colly should have been made to roar, Strauss sounds like a guy angry someone has scratched his rolls royce.

Which is better:

Got give it to the Aussies, and by that I mean Cricket Australia, and not the Sky one which is technically owned by an Aussie.

The Cricket Australia one is just more crickety.  The pacing is perfect, it makes you want to start the match as the bowlers come in.  Sure it has it’s problems (yes, I mean KEITH MILLER not being in it), but it has cricket in it, and not just Strauss and Swann waving bats around like they are auditioning for star wars the musical.  The average CG and camp costumes cancel each other out.  Both have terrible commentators that balance each other out. I watched them both back to back, and even Botham is way less annoying in the aussie one.  Although, both could do with 100% less Ian Botham.

The aussie one just feels better, like cricket is cool, not that cricket has to play dress ups to feel cool.  Although, a lion fighting a kangaroo in the Aussie one would have been a nice touch.

First seen over at the reverse sweep.

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19 thoughts on “Andrew Strauss roars, sort of

  1. Homer says:

    WTF? No Jerusalem???

  2. Soulberry says:

    They’re blessed…notice heaven’s white light towards the end. Guess that seals Australia’s fate now. No chance this time mate :)

  3. dude, too much verbosity and shit analysis for a shit fucking TV ad!

  4. Howe_zat says:

    Oh dear. It would’ve been fun if Beefy hadn’t wrecked it. The man is not an actor. Should’ve got Brian Blessed to do it.

  5. Mahek says:

    What is it with the Poms and all these war references? They did that for the FIFA World Cup too. Why the fuck can’t it just be about the sport like it was with the Aussie ad?

  6. Vim says:

    Is the skiver Ed Cowan?

  7. Chris Newell says:

    We a had a Carlsburg advert for the football world cup, this is like a really bad version of that. And the Carlsburg one was pretty bad to begin with.

    You’re right about Botham too, I would feel more inspired by Nasser Hussain than him.

    Really made me cringe when I saw it at the weekend and I refuse to watch it again, first thing I thought was ‘I hope the Aussies don’t see this’ and I bloody knew that jrod would be the first to mock.

  8. The Wrong'Un says:

    England have blown their tactics early by revelaling they have selected a lion and a fat topless man with a drum for the XI in place of Alistair Cook and Steve Finn.

  9. Benny says:

    man, you were spot on with the comment on stuart broad!!
    seriously, the ad becomes comical instead of inspiring, with his presence in it..

  10. Bring on the Ashes!! Ok, the India Australia series is still to be over and the first match entertained more than the last Ashes combined. However this time we see a role reversal. The Aussies are going to play catch up. The last time they played catch up in Australia, quite a few Pom careers went down the drain. While this time the Aussies are not half as strong as the last time, their creditable performance against India showed that they still can bring it on. Also, this may be the last Ashes at home for Ponting, Micheal Hussey,etc. If this does not rouse them, what can?

    On the other hand, the Poms look overconfident. They say they have results backing them up. Six consecutive series wins they say. However a) the wins include craps limited over shitfests b) It includes the Bangla boys and the “spotties” c) Most was in the English conditions.
    People forget their loss against Bangladesh, their batting collapses against the Pakistanis and the absolute dependance on the English weather to get 20 wickets out.

    Unwittingly or not, the Englishmen have not played in Australia for 4 years. Which means most of their bowlers have zero Aussie mileage. Not good.

    My prediction – Australia 3-0.

  11. The Aussie ad and the English ad show that there is a fine line between marketing and over-selling the product…Jeez…the english ad is so tacky.

  12. The Aussie ad and the English ad show that there is a fine line between marketing and over-selling the product…Jeez…the english ad is so tacky.

    Botham mumbles a lot that it is hard to understand. Mark Nicholas and Slater are terrible? Jrod, your level of expectation in the commentary box is pretty high….we in the sub-continent have such a low expectation (thanks to the repetitive stating of the obvious) that they seem refreshing and much better.

  13. we used to be a contender says:

    I really didn’t want us to lose to England this summer.

    Now I really really really don’t want us to.

    Fuck you Hilditch. Fuck you.

  14. Sami says:

    Fuck mine, a perfect opportunity to play on Strauss’ wing commander image and they blew it. Sky probably let Botham write this ad.

  15. vizz says:

    wake up poms…wake up…u must be dreamin to win in aus

  16. Wes ~PFCNFS~ says:

    The ad is absolutely fantastic. It has such a lot of humour in it. Why does nobody sense it. Guys take the sticks out of your backsides, the stuff you criticise is the funny side of it. As an old epic metal head I have to admit it totally knocks me on the head. Great stuff, Rock ‘n’ Roll served up with the wink of an eye, and that tad of manliness that makes it, well, manly.

  17. knowledge_eater says:

    You are right only Colly looks like making a cut, Broady Gladiator really!! I have vision of Sports eliminating War once for all from this earth, so I like the concept. Its never easy to win test match in Aus against Aus. NO matter how silly the team looks. Aus. almost pull-off beating India in India, now what more evidence do you need that how difficult the Ashes going to be for Poms.

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