intruders and draws

A couple of years back a dude broke into my house.

Unfortunately I was home at the time.

The dude saw me, ran off and stole a virtually worthless laptop.

He has never come back.

Having intruders in your home sucks a fair chunk of ass.

India recently invited an intruder to their house in a macho manoeuvre to show their superiority, then 11 big bastards turned up and mugged their team.

In the last 10 years India have beaten South Africa at home once, lost once, drawn once, and now can only win or draw.

That must hurt.

India has seen South Africa choke in big tournaments, struggle against England and only win one series against Australia (a team India has done pretty well against).

India have only ever won two series against South Africa, there first was back when I had only had sex once, and was wearing out copy of Basic Instinct on VHS.

The other was over 5 years ago.

It should be mentioned that India are pretty good at home.

So when an intruder (invited or otherwise) comes in to where you are good, and makes you less than good, that is really less than good. Exactly.

India has already given this series up, but a draw is needed to keep some sort of faith.

The way modern test series have gone of late, well at least those with England in them, a win after a loss by over an innings is possible.

India have even tried to pick a test team for this match, although I am pissed off they have abandoned the New Zealand tactic of employing two keepers in a game.

India losing the first test sort of ended this as a legitimate title fight (South Africa ruined their part in it by not beating England at home); the only result that could possibly explain the world of cricket right now would be India winning this test to draw the series.

When the best Test cricket can do is a hasty two test world championship series (if two tests is really a series, and it isn’t) between a side that can’t beat the heavyweights away from home and a side that coming into the series has won 2 of 8 tests it deserves nothing more than a draw.

It doesn’t even deserve Dale Steyn or Sehwag.

Those two should be rested on grounds of unnatural awesomeness.

This series deserves more Paul Harris.

2010: where mediocrity ruled the world.

Buy the book, get a t-shirt, or donate to the whisky fund.

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0 thoughts on “intruders and draws

  1. Deep Cower says:

    A two test series is a hell of a lot better than a no test series.

  2. alex says:

    Hahaha. India got bitch slapped in the first test. I do not see why SA can’t beat india again. India did not bring any enforcements. We all know VVS good only against aussies kind of swingless bowling. If it swings VVS is a bunny of steyn. Ok India brought sreesanth , sreesanth do bowl well in green top , he has never bowled well in indian pitches consistently.

    All SA has to do is be careful with sreesanth and they have the game in the pocket. Sreesanth go crazy if he do not get wicket in long spells , he start to spray and his monkey mind start to do all permutation and combinations and even do a dance on the pitch to distract opposition.

    Same murali Vijay , Same Badrinath , Same Bhajji , Same mishra ( small hands) , Same Zaheer khan (just enough to keep the spot) , Same bony brainless Ishant sharma (thyroid disease)…i don’t think india should be thinking having new white shirts will make difference in this TEST.

    if i am INDIA , i will play karthik number 3 and throw out Murali vijay. Karthik is fiesty but he always got his chances at wrong time. I even think he should open along with sehwag to save Gambhir similar fate like in the first Test. Karthik play well if someone put up a challenge. Other times he is just slack off like all indian teammates.

    Anyone one listening?. India can draw this if karthik plays this game. Without him i do not see india’s batting look decent unless GOD changes everything with one big inning. But most possible outcome is india’s loss.

    Only reason is india really do not have replacement for Dravid. you can replace 100’s of sachin with another stat whore , but you can’t find better team man than Dravid. :D

  3. Rishabh says:

    In this case, the guests came in when we had two broken arms in plasters, kicked our balls, picked up one of the few mini-trophies on the mantelpiece, and left – all through the front door.
    .-= Rishabh´s last blog ..India v South Africa 2: The Return of Laxman =-.

  4. Alex looks heavily misinformed here, first sreesanth is not playing, second just go and look up karthick’s recent last four international test match stats. And yes he can’t do much.

    And yes toking about statwhore dats what u call him!.. i just wonder if u even know to play the game, and ever scored in double digits, bcoz if you would, then you will realize you made such an insulting and such a not-needed, immature comment, i can only pity about how little you know naive kid.. dravid is of course missed.

    I think we are making a lot of speculations here, the transition phase has begun and Indian side has to be ready for such shocks and learn from them.

  5. alex says:

    hm no. That was posted long before game begun. India was innocous until 200/1 then i went to sleep.. That was great idea. I should stop watching then india may win this test. We will know tomorrow how sehwag / gambhir handles them. if they handle him well , then sachin will make another century. i hope this could help india win finnally he can say he contributed india win atlast.

    Sachin can shut me up if he scores when india need him and make india win. That is all anyone can ask for.

    Until then abuse will continue.

    I hate people go from jingoistic to excuses when table turned. they are pathetic people. Eden Garden crowd gave bhajji the boost he needed. I still think Ishant sharma pick is abolutely killed any chances of india win and mishra is really not good for TEST level as his hands are too small and u can read how the ball is spinning…so he has everything except he has small hands not good for wrist spinners.

    Still long way to go. I think Graeme smith should play in middle order and make amla and pieterson open to avoid khan uprooting his stump again with new ball.

    I do think picth has enough for steyn to make big damage. I will again not going to watch tonight and hope india put on mammoth score. :D

    When i watch they choke mostly.

  6. Yawn says:

    Woot! Woot! Woke up to one of the most pleasing headlines on cricinfo. Is this just a flash in the pan or is the sardarji really back?


  7. Shaitaan says:

    Alex = chat whore.

  8. Rishabh says:

    Funny thing is, Bhaj got no wickets because of turn, they were all straight balls in different forms – topspinner, armball, etc.

    I’d give the entire credit to Zak for keeping India in the game for two sessions.
    .-= Rishabh´s last blog ..India v South Africa 2: The Return of Laxman =-.

  9. alex says:

    Chat whore. hahahaa. Sachin followers comes up with different names to attack me when their GOD sachin can’t shut me up with winning the game on his own when india needs him. Forget winning atleast draw the game on his own.

    Until then nothing touch me. I am teflon. I do not exist ..sort of …i only see fear in sachin fans that i might be telling the truth. :D


  10. Left Arm Seamers Club Member says:

    Jrod, are you talking about sucking a fair chunk of “Equus africanus asinus” cause the frogs eat horses and donkeys all the time, cant be that bad! I imagine if you use a condiment of some kind like a nice tomato based sauce it might be nice.

    Agree, two tests blatantly not a series. Waste of time really.

  11. Shaitaan says:

    Sachin? I worship no God, false or true. My name should’ve told you that.

    I from the first was present
    And with mighty wings oe’rspread,
    Dove-like sat’st brooding over the Abyss
    And madest it pregnant.

    And chat ‘whore’ is probably too good for you — no one would pay a skank like you for anything. You’re more of a chat biatch.

  12. alex says:

    It does no matter. You need to understand you are only talking about yourself. hahahaha.


    Ask questions , if you do not know. :D

  13. Shaitaan says:

    Hahaha! The troll-biatch plays kiddie games! Not here, kiddo. It’s too quiet here now. Your moral teething will happen in public view.

  14. alex says:

    Keeep at it sachin fans…it is not going to work…hahaha. i am invincible. Because i am right about sachin and sachin fans. Think. Ask questions. That is the only way to freedom from slavery of sachin disease. :D

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