The IPL is back in India, splash water on your face, do a push up, read the paper

Buy the book, get a t-shirt, or donate to the whisky fund.

Like Ganguly doesn’t have an employee to wash his face.

The stunt double pretending to be Warne is doing a great job.

Has anyone ever read the paper with more intensity.

The IPL is back in India.

The IPL is back, so are the weird ass ads.

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0 thoughts on “The IPL is back in India, splash water on your face, do a push up, read the paper

  1. Ceci says:

    Looking forward so much to the brash and v long franchise vids too. Found this still pic for you: http://www.twitpic.com/z4li8

  2. […] IPL a couple of months away.  Find some of the mad ad vids at cricket with balls – could only find a still […]

  3. lolz Indian are in to take anything for the sake of publicity and these ADs are perfecto for the masses in India :P
    .-= Reverse Swing´s last blog ..Australia v Pakistan ODI 2010 – Pakistan Squad Preview =-.

  4. lareina says:

    Ceci, that image is going to haunt my nightmares for at least a week. -shudder-

    That last video made me smile. I can’t help it, I love Anil Kumble so. My reflex reaction is to go, “Aww, Anil, we missed you too!”

  5. Rishabh says:

    Along with the IPL returns my expert(ly ridiculous) review and opinion-sharing. Look a bit lower!
    .-= Rishabh´s last blog ..IPL 3 – Transfers – You read it here! =-.

  6. Mahek says:

    Hard to imagine wearing those garish colours at his home. Not as hard to imagine as Warney doing those push-ups. The only push-ups he’s into are from Victoria’s Secret.
    .-= Mahek´s last blog ..FICA and the need for a Collective Bargaining Agreement – II =-.

  7. lareina says:

    You never know, Mahek: sometimes, a man just wants to feel pretty in the comfort of his own home.

  8. Deep Cower says:

    Sourav starts off looking tough. And then he starts talking.

    I ate ten ice cream bars today. In forty minutes.

  9. They are back. This time with a kickass diplomatic conspiracy to do the free publicity. The Pakistani cricketing fraternity has got united after a looooong time over, surprise surprise, India bashing.

    IPL 1 led to player auctioneering.
    IPL 2 led to a domestic cricket of one country being played in front of another cricket being accepted and hell, celebrated.
    IPL 3 is leading to the Pakiastani cricketers getting united.

    IPL sure is revolutionary
    .-= Dhananjay Mhatre´s last blog ..Short Story 4 – Been there, seen that. =-.

  10. alex says:

    My problem is this , they play in IPL and praise pakistan. That will make all IPL owners cringe.

    Shaid afridi is very talented for T20 but he is a time bomb about to explode anyplace , anytime. Some people are high when they disrupt things.

    Like me… :D

    Where is sachin disciples…yawn…timothy horatius….they also become my puppets. :D

  11. jogesh99 says:

    So pakis obsessing over indians, and vice versa. Meanwhile the drones continue their good work … . Dumbass desis!

    Alex, I’ll boycott the IPL if you will.

  12. Yawn says:

    I am no Sachin fan! Rahul Dravid’s ma man!! And your puppet, kiss my ass!

    coinbox.

  13. Mock Wah says:

    cant wait cant wait cant wait… :)
    .-= Mock Wah´s last blog ..2009 – gone bys & good byes 4th QTR =-.

  14. Sunny says:

    whinging pakis. many australians didn’t get picked and a small dick got rejected by KKR even (KKR!!) but don’t see them complaining.

    pakistan win some shit tournament in england and they think the entire world owes them. everyone knows that the only time sri lanka win a final is when they are playing india. i have an idea…why don’t they all signup for ICL? what no loyalty in this money grubbing world?!

  15. Sach says:

    Yawn
    .-= Sach´s last blog ..Accidents =-.

  16. The Gaz Man says:

    No Pakistani’s being selected is a topic worth discussing. Is it racist? Is it because of availability? Is it because of possible terrorist attacks? Fark me – but if any team that could not use Afridi for a pittance and then makes steaming turd excuses not to pick him is flat out lying to everyone. It is pant-wettingly hysterical

    1. They are available – so that is out
    2. Terrorist attacks? – How would this change whether Pakistani players were playing or not. The IPL has made a commitment to double/triple/quadruple security during the tournament. After the Mumbai attacks, it is ridiculous to state that the IPL will be any less lax wether a Pakistani is playing or not.
    3. Racism – hmmm, discrimination against a race of people. Seems plausible. No one from the 20/20 World Champions gets a gig. And the comments on this site aren’t remotely sympathetic to missing these champions in action. Dhananjay and Sunny – I didn’t see you taking the piss out of India for winning the 1st 20/20, classic now that when you don’t hold it you don’t value the tournament. If you don’t value 20/20 why wade in on whether Pakistan players are picked?

    Perhaps we need serial racist Chris Broad to adjudicate on this one?

  17. Jay says:

    I miss Kumble’s ‘tache. And not in a gay way. Well, maybe a little bit gay.

  18. Chetan says:

    ummm…. totally not connected with this post but couldnt find a comments link on the poll…

    nice one this biggest dick thing… though was terribly disappointed not to find sreesanth’s name there…

    cheers

  19. alex says:

    India is racist country. True that.

    Castism(hinduism, brahminism , vedic mumbo jumbo)
    North South racism.
    Skin Color Racism
    Paki Racism (more on fear level that they disrupt india).

    I wanted to see Umar Akmal in IPL though. I do not like afridi even though he is da best 20/20 player in the world because he is disruptive force in any team.

    IPL owners are so stupid They should have picked one or two like umar akmal and umar gul who do not dirupt that much and avoid all these nonsense.

    It almost seems like IPL hates pakistanis. True that. :D

  20. alex says:

    Also IPL is for indian people and it is not about winning with enemy(pakis) players. After 26/11 , any thing associated with pakistan is consider enemy. Until pakistan put that pak ISI dudes who planned and attacked in jail , it will be like that forever. Problem for pakistan is that it is their army does terrorist activities , so they can’t do anything about it.

    India should also kick out all pakistani commentators and workers if any OR just nuke each other and done with it. It is always going towards mutual annihilation. I know pak nukes work (because chinese gave them), i wonder will indian nukes work when it mattered or it will be like crackers at rainy day…just a small spark,

    Hope that will kill off castism with any people left. :D

    Pakistan is eternal pain in the arse for India. British should never divided india. What a blunder. That said i would like divide India as small as possible and Then make Indian union out of all these small countrie or states. In think corruption is impossible to remove when there is no accountability. When people start to expect more from leaders , country will start to grow.

  21. Goro says:

    Engaging rant mode.

    Enough with the bullshit whining already. That’s ALL we ever do, whine, whine, whine about some slight to our fucking honour. What shit. We HAVE no honour, respect or self-respect. How about we EARN some worth for once?

    We don’t even mind that the c**** are losing everything they play. Just play with some spirit, and show us that you fucking care like we do.

    We’re NOT isolated. We’ve been playing nonstop since the ODI series against the kiwis.

    And finally, if the positions were exchanged, we’d have treated the Indians the same. Worse even. Desis are just miserable fucking people. So don’t whine when they act like asswipes. It’s not like Afridi needed that money to feed his 3000 starving children in some Karachi slum. He’ll SURVIVE.

    Just shut up, play the fucking GAME, and show us something to cheer for. Any fucking thing.

  22. alex says:

    Pakistanis lack motivation anything other than jihad or gripe about india. :D
    Every country suck different way , India suck more actually. 80% poor. No roads. Still snakes everywhere. Monkeys in delhi. :D Extremes exist!. Example India.

    Pakistanis should Worry about their game against aussies not about india. if a team play really well , no one will refuse them because people want to see a good contest.

    Why should indian pay money to pakistan players millions to get abused with pak rehtoric? if you want money , play by the rules of people who have money. Playing in IPL and drumbeating about pakistan in India is big NO NO. Shahid afridi blabbering his mouth for a while , he will not be picked even next year. He needs to learn to say politically correct things.

    Advertisement Dollars. If people do not like to watch , no money for owners. Pakistani players should learn to say nice things about IPL and BCCI if they really want to get picked. It is same for everyone. No exception. Money has boundary beyond countries , religion. if Rameez raja say something bad about IPL , he will lose money immediately.

    Whining is part of human gene. It is embedded in nano technology…showings fits and hope you get what you want. :Pakis follows it to letter :D

  23. Timothy says:

    As I said earlier, I don’t give a #$%& whether Sachin plays in his team or not. Oh, and regarding puppetry, someone clearly needs to remove the bat up their @$$.

  24. Sunny says:

    @gazman – racism?! we are the same ppl.

    i should give up on trying to be funny.

    the simple reason as to why the pakistanis and even the aussies didn’t get picked is availability. last year many teams were hurt from aussies not being available. this year they decided not to take a chance. i will miss sohail tanvir and imran nazir as well. afridi can go fug himself with the chick on roller skates with bright pink pigtails.

    burning effigies, politicians wading in…where is this moral outrage against lashkar or other terrorists? pakistanis need to get their priorities right.

  25. jogesh99 says:

    No Pakis or Aussies – maybe the Bongs from across the border will get their chance. Look at it as a long term investment, we might help create a fleet of Gangulys.

  26. @Gaz
    When have I lampooned Pakistan’s 2020 win? I have just commented on the joke that is the members of the Pakistani cricket fraternity, past and present. Isn’t Miandad, the person who got his daughter married into the family of the chap who was instrumental in the 93 bombing of Mumbai and is the most wanted man right now kinda like Osama, calling the IPL the mafia funny? You have got some really jobless ex cricketers who take the slighest excuse to rant against India. Inspite of that, you will find lots of fans of Paki cricketers like Akram, Younis, etc. here. Heck Wasim is still employed by the KKR. Then when this happens, your esteemed ex cricketers go shitting all over India without even trying to understand who took that decision. It was a decision of the fucking franchises, not the Indian government. Rail against them. Do not go into conspiracy theories.

    Racism?Really? Really?
    .-= Dhananjay Mhatre´s last blog ..Short Story 4 – Been there, seen that. =-.

  27. The Gaz Man says:

    DM – then what is it? Why did the franchises request Pakistani players to be on the list and then not bid for them? Forget about the ridiculous subsequent outrage, what happened between the franchises shortlisting the Pakistanis and auction day? I just do not believe that any franchise would not have a player of Afridi’s calibre, especially if they could have bought him for $200K. So what happened? Who made the directive?

  28. alex says:

    Afridi is a time bomb. But i would like to see Umar Akmal and Umar gul. They should have been selected over some unknown morgan dude.

    For me pakistani players stop making this pak vs india. Anyone screams this and that will never get picked even next year.

    You never piss off your future BOSS. No one need to pick pak players unless if they like them.

    Pakis should shut up and play and beat aussies fair and square. No easy money in the world.

    Even Jrod has to work like dog to make money forhis next meal :d

  29. alex says:

    Do i own Timothy, Yawn and horatius? Seems like i do. :D

  30. Timothy says:

    With so many franchises waiting to splurge on Pollard and Bond, bringing Afridi and co under the hammer in the beginning ensured that no one risked their money on them.

    For the troll
    …………………./´¯/)
    ………………..,/¯../
    ………………./…./
    …………./´¯/’…’/´¯¯`·¸
    ………./’/…/…./……./¨¯
    ……..(‘(…´…´…. ¯~/’…’)
    ……………………..’…../
    ……….”…………. _.·´
    ……………………..(
    …………..………….…

  31. I do not know. Ask the goddamn franchises. They were given visas btw and their names were okayed for auction. Then the franchises developed cold feet after thinking about it. If the Govt. had to give a directive, then the visas would not have been given especially with the 11th hour application giving a good excuse to them.
    .-= Dhananjay Mhatre´s last blog ..Short Story 4 – Been there, seen that. =-.

  32. alex says:

    Truth is that indians do not like pakistanis making money on indian sweat!. Ha. :D

  33. jogesh99 says:

    Gaz, you are right about the racism though. The real reason caste Hindus hate Muslims (and therefore, more so, the Pakis) is because most Indian Muslims were low-castes who converted out of Hinduism into a more egalitarian religion. So in the hindu mind, they are not only low-caste, but also betrayers of their assigned role as niggers.

    The roots of Hindu-Muslim hatred lie not in the Islamic conquests, nor in Indo-Pak wars, but in caste.

    Though in particular case, its just business as usual. It doesnt seem like a government directive, more like fear of back-lash from the Shiv Sena and similar crud.

  34. alex says:

    I won’t mind india getting nuked by crazy pakis.Especially bombay, delhi, All of UP/Gujarat. :D

    Time for equalize things. People will only do that when they are dead. :D

  35. jogesh99 says:

    The fall-out will float down to the Andamans, or Mauritius or wherever you are currently interred Alex.

  36. rohan says:

    Sohail Tanvir, who helped the Rajasthan Royals win and got the highest number of wickets in the first IPL is being interviewed by another journalist while the glamorous hostess, Farah, looks on. Consider Tanvir’s remark: “Hinduon ki zahaniyat hi aisi hai (the Hindu nature is like that only)” the implication being that the Hindus have deliberately deceived and humiliated Pakistanis. The journalist responds with a remark about Indians being “baniyas” and says: “bagal meN chhuri/ muuNh meN Ram Ram” (they are ready to plunge a knife behind your back though they will keep saying Ram Ram).

  37. shajar hussain says:

    The fact is that India is a country with their minds sick with pakistan., if any child is born without a father like lalit modi the blame goes to pakistani or ISI. y r so much sick that you have shown your sick mentality to the world, and the level of hate even with the sports……………………………………….shame on u alll……do any bengali is better than shaid afridi, umer akmal, misbah-ul-haq……sohail tanvir was the man of series for ipl1………………………….MOST OF ALL…..IS THEIR ANY TEAM WHICH HAS PLAYED TWO CONSECUTIVE T20 FINALS………………………WE R THE WINNERS OF T20 WORLDCUP
    …………………….is their any one like us………NO……if your team was SO GUD THAN WHY COULDN’T IT EVEN PLAYED EVEN THE SEMIFINALS OF CHAMPIONS TROPHY 09, in fact whole india was praying for PAKISTAN.to win…HAHAHAHA…. THATS WHAT PAKISTAN IS !…………………..SHAME ON IPL AND INDIA…….MY indian friends listen IPL is a private league ….it has no contact with indian gov..and aproved by icc for intl players..but even their u hav shown ur disgusted mind. if i would BE the leader of pakistan i would ban my players from playing in a country with the sick minded people….shame on u
    …and in the thanks 4 showing your inner feelings for pakistan………….1 DAY WE WILL TEACH U A LESSON….how to play……we r not greedy 4 IPL we spit at that…..
    WE R THE CHAMPIONS….PAKISTAN ZINDABAD

  38. Rishabh says:

    It hurts my eyes. And brain.

    If you look at the individual requirements of each franchise, none of the Pakistan players were really needed… except for KKR – but then KKR needs a lot more than just players.

    This isn’t a racist act… considering the tension (caused by numbheaded paranoid thinkers like our friend above) between India and Pakistan, why should franchise owners pay a lot of money for players who could suddenly by yanked back home by their own Board?

    We know you need the money, but get over it and try to be diplomatic for cricket’s sake.
    .-= Rishabh´s last blog ..IPL 3 – Transfers – You read it here! =-.

  39. jogesh99 says:

    Alex, you have a soulmate.

  40. shajar hussain says:

    1st of all i want talk my friend RISHABh ……….sir its not just that simple or plane incident as you r posting it or maybe getting it on ur mind….IPL is a private league i which the top world players are allowed to play……and franchises bought them like in football………pakistani were ignored right from begining as their were v isa problems and other things……………if u see the vdo of auctioning…it is nothing but mere humiliation of our heroes…………no one even makes a single bid………………..how can that happen…………all were told not to go for pqakistanis…………….. and now u r saying slots were full………….if their was problem of unavailabilty…….. they would had been ruled out of auctioning………why their names were called for humiliation?……..this is the question burning in every pakistani mind……….if same thing would have happened with MS DHoNI….what would have been ur reaction …just think over that with a cool mind………………………Honestly speaking i was fan of IPL ……watching every match…………..but now we r insisting our cable operaters to not to show these matches…..because we hate watching…so called..(Indian peoples league)……sorry if i was too harsh…………………………..

  41. shajar hussain says: