Dilshan: the pimp daddy of batting

You know when you have that dream that you are the most Awesomest thing alive.

Either you are a rockstar with men throwing their boxer shorts on stage, a boxer with old white Jewish writers saying you are better than Ali or some politician that fixes the world and also fights off evil aliens.

Everyone has the dream where they are cool.

Well channel that, are you there yet, are you awesome in your imagination.


Now think of Dilshan’s batting of late.

Be honest, is your imaginary character as cool as he is.

No, ofcourse not.

How could it be?

Dilshan is some sort of Steve McQueen/Angela Davis/Bruce Lee/Ned Kelly hybrid at the moment.

Cooler than Ice, Harder than Nails, tastier than a quick burger.

He is like some sort of souped-up super-pimp crime-fighting freedom-fighting bastard straight from hell.

And now he has a beard, how can your imagination beat this?

The dilscoop starfish thing.

The wearing a hat while batting.

The open chest surrounded by bling.

And everything else that he brings to the game of cricket.

All he needs is a Rolls Royce made of Gold, an ivory walking stick and cricket would have to crown him the grand poobah of batting.

What happened?

Not that long ago he was a middle order struggler who never really did enough and had a pretty ordinary record.

Now he is the dog’s bollocks, the cat’s pyjamas, the moose’s caboose.

On one level I want to know how this struggling dude made it to the top of the mountain.

But on the other hand, fuck it.

Let us just enjoy this gift of awesomeness that has surely been delivered by our God of Sehwagology.

Amen, Dilshan, Amen.

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0 thoughts on “Dilshan: the pimp daddy of batting

  1. Sunny says:

    two words: natalie portman.

  2. Brett says:

    Sehwag = Moses
    Dilshan = J.C.

  3. sasha says:

    Rock on Dilshan!!…lankans are juz too superb…

  4. MTJAG says:

    Dilshan is a force of mother nature.
    Dilshan is officially the 8th wonder of the world.
    There’s a planet that is going to be named Dilshan.
    The world consists of nothing but Dilshan and all of us little Dilshamaniacs.
    The Dilscoop is now officially the 32nd flavour offered in baskin robbins.


  5. Michael says:

    bullshit blog … cricket with balls.. this blog writer got none

  6. Michael says:

    jrod is a moron fcuking retard… get ur head out of ur ass next time you care to write anything

    • jrod says:

      Michael, just get your swearing right. You misspelt fucking, and it would have sounded better had you said, “jrod is a fucken moronic retard”.

  7. Adrian says:


    If you don’t like it, don’t visit.

  8. damith says:

    whoever asked dilshan to bat at the top needs be given a proper deepthroat, unless it was a woman, then we need to make her squirt with pleasure.

    and micheal, pls stay on topic, this is about dilshan, not how crap jrod is.

  9. Chris says:

    Michael is right, cricket with balls, Jrod you dont got none. Sure you may be able to draw them and put them on t-shirts, caps, pens, bibs, underpants, etc etc etc, but where are the real crickets with balls????

  10. alex says:

    oh oh we are getting trolls…that means cricket with balls are spreading all over horizon. Yeh.

  11. Dhananjay Mhatre says:

    Dilshan was transformed after joining the Daredevils or rather , God’s Anjels. It is official – Sehwag is God and Dilshan is his first messenger.

    Also, we got trolls. The cricinfo dig rubbing your blog the right way.

  12. Sunny says:

    @dhans – somehow i don’t expect the same daredevilry from collingwood!

  13. Dhananjay Mhatre says:

    @Sunny The man is not deemed fit to be given a single game. Maybe Sehwag wants time to convert him into his image (very challenging task).

  14. batting in ned kelly's helmet says:

    Is it just me, or is Dilshan what Johnny Depp does on his days off?

  15. sasha says:

    jrod, regardless of what some “fucking moronic retards” say,….I think u are pretty awesome…

  16. Vaughan says:

    I also think that Dilshan must follow the Gary Kirsten school of match preparation. But whereas, say, Graeme Smith enjoys 3 minutes of bland missionary or just beats one out solo in his hotel room, Dilshan is snorting coke off the breasts of a bevy of Bolshoi-trained blonde Russian $5000-a-night call girls and giving them an awesome seeing to that they’ll never forget.

  17. it is just awesome to watch dilSHAAN going, he has just introduced a new taste in batting specially top order , opening an inning.

    let see how far he can drag his team in ICC Champions Trophy 2009, w strong contender for best batsman though.

  18. ca2ca says:


    looks like you didn’t get ur daily Golden shower from your Mom !!!!

  19. coruja says:

    This can be explained. Rick James passed away sometime in 2004. Obviously Dilshan has now been possessed by his rougish wondering funk-soul. Super freaky.