Tagged with aus vs nz …

Mar 31 2010
18 Comments
aussies, kiwis

Australia complete unbeaten test summer while no one watches

New Zealand had 3 century makers.

Nathan Hauritz took 4 wickets.

Jesse Ryder made 1 hundred in first class cricket.

And Australia won 2 nil.

That is the series in numbers, but it was so much less than that.

For those of you who didn’t see it, the vocal 92%, here it is in snappy sentences.

The IOB replacement, Brent Arnel, looked as dependable as your dad’s old ford, but no where near as exciting.

Ryan Harris bustled in like the term was invented for him, but while he took wickets, he didn’t look as penetrating as he had in ODIs.

Vettori did everything, again, but it was not enough, it is never enough.

Prince Brendon has now made two test hundreds against legitimate opposition, but still thinks he can cut it as a batsmen only.

Mitchell Johnson ended a disappointing time for him with a pair and a ten wicket haul.

Jeets continued to look good without taking wickets.

Marcus North has marked his name down for the first Ashes test even though he had to bat with Steve Smith draped on his shoulders.

Ross Taylor played one of the best IPL audition innings ever.

BJ Watling can field, pause, that is all.

Simon Katich really hates Kiwis.

Australia has now won their last 6 test matches against teams ranked 6th, 7th & 8th according to the ICC boffins.

And Michael Clarke had some personal problems.

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Mar 27 2010
8 Comments
aussies, kiwis

the krab digs in, again

Had Simon Katich been born in New Zealand his whole career would make more sense.

An intelligent man with permanent three day growth, a batting technique that is rough on the eyes, some years in the wilderness, a failed career as a wrist spinner, and someone who struggles to convert fittys into hundreds.

Katich is a perpetual struggler.

Even when he is going well.

His career would be perfect for New Zealand, in almost any era.

Without him on the first day of the test Australia would have collapsed for a far more embarrassing total. Again.

Katich is making a habit out of making runs when no one else in the Australian team does.  He is like Michael Clarke if Michael Clarke’s technique was burnt in a vat of acid and he had to prove himself in every test.

In a team with one champion and a few great front runners, Katich sticks out.

The only other batsman Australia has who is willing to play ugly is his partner in grime, Michael Hussey.

Since the start of ’09 the Krab has been averaging a very solid 52 while making 3 hundreds and 10 fittys.

In his career, 12 times he has made between 75 and 99, only once was he not out.  In that time he has only made 6 scores in the 20s.

These are all important stats.  I am not sure what they mean, but whatever they mean, they mean a lot of it.

Katich averages 76 against the kiwis, maybe because he feels a deep spiritual bond with them.

This collapse has continued Australia’s run of getting bowled out at least once per series for less than 250, that run starts at the Bastard Monkey series of 07/08.

That deserves some applause. Ofcourse I could be wrong, I used all my research on Simon Katich.

Dictator Dan took wickets, but the rest of the media might mention that.

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Mar 23 2010
11 Comments
aussies, kiwis

Australia fail in 20 over chase

New Zealand set Australia 106 to chase, but even though it was only marginally more than 5 runs an over Australia could not get over the line. Australia’s record in 20 over chases outside Australia continues to be quite shit.

Phil Hughes, who sees all innings as auditions for the IPL incase he gets bad press again, was at his attacking best. In two overs he inspired 23 runs off New Zealand’s most trusted bowlers. This included a smack over mid on for six from Vettori and his normal ugly effectiveness against the quicks. Hughes bludgeoned 86 off 75 balls.

At the other end, Katich protested the whole 20 over concept, his strike rate of 27 was a personal statement on what form of cricket he likes best. Katich was in his complete krab like mode and refused to even pretend to score runs. In the past this would have lead to a fantastic collapse from Australia, but Hughes youthful excitement made the 20 over chase a possibility at times.

While Australia did miss out on winning in 20 overs, they won the moral victory by winning the test. Doug Bollinger kissed his underwear after the match and Ryan Harris’ chest swelled so much that no one could fit in the change room.

New Zealand’s two cricketers, Prince Brendon and Dictator Dan, must be a little disappointed that their side made 564 in total, being that they made 42% of them (I think that is right) between the two of them. Vettori is thinking of changing the batting order for the next match with Tuffey to go in at 3 and for Ingram to bowl medium pace when the other bowlers are tired.

Only the carrot of the IPL can keep the smiles on the faces of the New Zealand middle order marvels.

This game might seem like just another test, but it could be the last time Australia ever enforces the follow on. Even though they won by 10 wickets with their dicks in the air, it must have made them nervous once the chase went over 100. Their nerves must be shot.

It should also be mentioned that Phil Hughes now averages 51.25 in test cricket. It doesn’t mean much, but it makes me smile a little.

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Mar 19 2010
3 Comments
aussies, kiwis

previously at the basin

Australia

They played the first two sessions with the intensity of someone pressing snooze. The third session was all beer and skittles as Clarke and North woke everyone up.

New Zealand

Kiwis seemed to be as earnest as a young nerdy kid who gets to hang out with cool kids one day. Eventually they were discarded. Dropping Katich twice before tea was not a highlight.

Who should win

Too early to tell, but New Zealand already need the sort of victory that gets people all excited and almost never happens.

Play of the day

Martin Guptil’s first ball would have been embarrassing if he was playing in a pub side on a Tuesday arvo, which he wasn’t.

Testicular moment of the day

Most people don’t prepare for a test by ending a relationship ship with a tabloid queen, Clarke did, and it seemed to help. If Australia can organise for a messy break up on the verge of every series (surely his mate Warne could help) Clarke could go from pup to big dog.

Working class moment

Marcus North had to grovel at the toes of the selectors to even get a game in this match, then he made a very solid Marcus North like 50, only to find that no one was watching his end.

An innings described in comic book terms

Phil Hughes: whoosh, thwack, crack, ssshwa, argh, shit.

Navjot Sidhu moment of the day

Allan Border on Justin Langer: He’s quite humorous and interesting. And a deep thinker on all things.

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