After Hitler’s cricket manifesto bombed, he tried to buy an IPL franchise:
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Tagged with adolf hitler …
Mein Cricket
The Times recently mentioned that Hitler once played a game of cricket and also tried to re-write the rules.
What they didn’t mention was that he also write a book dedicated to the game of cricket.
Obviously I could never go through all the over written prose, but I can break down the chapters for you.
Introduction
Where Hitler explains why the game of cricket is a proud game and it needs help as the threat of lesser games, especially hockey, is staring people in the face but no one wants to admit it.
Chapter 2: Years of Study and Suffering in Sydney
Adolf talks about his early years of learning cricket by watching Don Bradman in Shield games.
Chapter 3: Subjects and Citizens
Explaining the cricket nations. South Africa, England, New Zealand and Australia are good, India and the West Indies, not so much.
Chapter 4: Personality and the Conception of the LBW rule
While it may sound controversial now, Hitler wanted the LBW revoked because he wanted pads banned. His thoughts were that without pads the batsmen had to make the ultimate sacrifice for his wicket.
Chapter 5: Philosophy and Organisation
Hitler was not a fan of the Imperial Cricket Conference.
Chapter 6: The Struggle of the Early Period – the Significance of the Spoken Word
No one campaigned for better radio commentary than Adolf did. He found McGilvray’s sucking up to the sponsors appalling and thought Swanton’s constant reference to well hit shots as spitzer bullets to be in poor taste.
Chapter 7: The Struggle with the Front Foot No ball
Years before it came into cricket, Hitler was campaigning for the front foot no ball rule. As a shorter man, he thought the back foot rule helped taller bowlers.
Chapter 8: The Strong Man Is Mightiest Alone
A nonsensical chapter about the why the last man standing rule should be brought into test cricket for the 4th innings.
Chapter 9: Basic Ideas Regarding the Meaning and Organization of the Sturmabteilung
I think this is about the importance of batting first drop.
Chapter 10: Wicket keeping as a Mask
Hitler always believed that wicket keepers were a poorer species of cricketer.
Chapter 11: Propaganda and Organization
Hitler, like Kerry Packer and Lalit Modi years later, knew that with a little bit of show bizz and organisation cricket could go a long way.
Chapter 12: The Wrist Spin Question
Hitler believed legspin was a form of cheating.
Chapter 13: Teammate Alliance Policy After the Game
A chapter on why the after game beer was a terrible policy.
Chapter 14: Eastern Orientation or Eastern Policy
Hitler believed that cricket could become a tool of the Eastern countries that would come back to bite the west. Although he also believed that they would never be able to produce good slip fielders and would always struggle with the short stuff.
Chapter 15: The Right of Emergency Defensive shot
Attack, attack, attack were the principles of his game, but everyone needs to defend sometime.
Conclusion
Cricket could become the most powerful sport in the world if only it had a leader with courage who could bring together all the lesser countries.
Nimbus TV with help from Michael Kasprowicz laugh at Adolf Hitler
Well done Nimbus.
For giving us the gift on some Indian fucktard who is carrying on like a wanker while wearing an Adolf Hitler mask.
Well done Michael Kasprowicz.
For not pointing out that it wasn’t on, and instead talking about the fans having smiles on their faces.
Adolf Hitler masks are not really for the cricket, and if some dickhead does take one in, there was no reason to show the guy wearing it.
Luckily for the BCCi there are no Jewish players in the Ausralian side, but there are Jewish players in first class cricket, the Hebrew Hammer Michael Klinger.
What would have been better was if after the innings the Australian audience were sent back to the Sydney studios for Jon Moss, a Jewish ex shield cricketer who now does commentary for Foxsports.
These two might not have found it so funny to see a fan lapping up the attention of the camera crew while wearing a mask of someone who tried to exterminate their ancestors.
Someone who as largely responsible for about 70 million deaths. 11 million of those he signed the papers for himself.
Perhaps not someone that people want to hear described as having a smile on his face.
Here is the dickhead.
I know that some Indians don’t always see the Holocaust as something that bad, but having your head up your ass isn’t a realistic defence in my mind.
Nimbus, will there be an apology to the jewish members of your audience, or those who just think that someone enjoying themselves in a hitler mask is in the shittest possible taste.
EDIT: I apologise to the BCCI, bccI and the BCCi for saying they were involved in this. I thought they owned the images and hired Nimbus to film them. That was incorrect.
