I’ve never read Peter Roebuck’s book, but I have read similar efforts from ‘Norman Mailer from a posh school’Ed Smith and ‘Dileep Premachandran without the western pop culture influences’Aakash Chopra.

Chopra and Smith right some clever words, but they aren’t really one of us.

Cricket with balls’Eddie Cowan is one of us.

He’s got that natural funny piss takey delivery, he’s not afraid to say something that might land him in trouble, and he is just the right kind of narcissist for this sort of book.

The other 3 are intelligent earnest individuals trying to unravel cricket through their writing, Eddie is trying to do that, but without disappearing up the giant anus of id.

If you go to buy this book on kindle, it comes up with “customers who bought this item also bought” Australian Autopsy, as the first result.

That’s pretty strong evidence that readers of here will like Eddie’s book.

Now I’m not a fan of the cover, or title, and I think Eddie will become a 10 times better writer than this book shows, but this is a quality book about a dude trying to play for his country while trapped in his own head.

If you want to know something about shield cricket, or are a tasmanian fan, there is something in here for you, it also has the best bromance since S Collins and j kimber.  Ed’s relationship with George Bailey is something special, and could have only been ruined by Ed detailing the moment when they truly embraced their feelings.

So, take a look and buy it if you think it’s your bag.

Think of it as a book written by that friend of yours who you first drank absinthe with, who’s just a little too picky with women and puts you down so well you have to like him. But you know, about cricket.

If you want to amazon or kindle with it.

Aussies can find it closer to home.

Or if you can’t find it, go into a bookstore and give them the ISBN 9781742233154.

But you should get it, because it’s Eddie fucken Cowan’s book.

His innings contained 3 attacking shots and more patience than an Ozu film.

Now, we could go on and on about how great cricket with balls’eddie cowan is, but that is what you expect.

This is probably not what you expect, but we think eddie will like it.

Well done, Eddie. And anyone else who was less important but still involved.

Like you, my career in Shield cricket was tragically shorter than I wanted.  While you got 4 games with the Vics, I played none at all.  This hurts me, so I can imagine that it hurts you too.  But you can deal with heartbreak in better ways than by destroying your old flame.

You’re obviously a modern man.  You’ve probably got a blackberry, an iphone, home and work laptops and a pedometer.  But that doesn’t mean that old things are shit and can be discarded.

James, you and I are not so different.  We both put pants on before leaving the home.  We both love cricket.  We’ve both watched Victoria win a Shield final.

That is where we differ, for me, the Shield Final is the pinnacle, a game of cricket as good as first class cricket can get.  Where two sides play off to prove their worth, the odds stacked in the favour of one side, buy giving 22 players a chance of proving that they are test worthy.

For you it is the wrapping around a Quarter Pounder.

The 2007/08 Final sucked balls for Victoria, but the selectors were watching.  Hughes and Siddle jumped older players, Bryce’s performance put him down the list, Beau Casson got test out of it and Simon Katich proved his rebirth was not some fluke. It was a cracking game of cricket, NSWales at near full strength, Victoria proving they were a hell of a side.  It went 5 days, there was a result, Stuart MacGill told Nick Jewell to stop being a drama queen.

James, how could you deny anyone this?

The shield season is not exactly long at the moment; teams only play 10 games each.  It breaks down like this:

3 in October

8 in November

5 in December

2 in January

6 in February

6 in March

1 final in March

If you can play 6 matches at the start of March, you can play 6 at the end of October. Start the season a week earlier and you could have 8 matches in October and you can scrap the January games.  If you can play 8 in November, you can play 8 in February.  And surely you could fit in a boxing day game once a year, or the day after boxing day. Then it would be:

8 in October

8 in November

6 in December

8 in February

1 final March.

January, when most Australian cricket fans are really interested, becomes your 2020 month.  The rest of the season is for proper cricket.  And March is your final.  Having it at least two weeks earlier than it is now.  No first class cricket is lost, and most importantly, the final is still there.  If you think this is cramming cricket in a bit much, then jettison a few one dayers, have all teams play each other once, and play two sides in their region twice.  If that is even an issue, which I doubt.

The final doesn’t have to go, and neither do any games.  Australian domestic cricketers will play at least 30 days less than their English brethren, and that doesn’t need to change, it just needs to be re-jigged.

Forget being the modern man, the bitter man, or the cut price Australian Lalit man, and just try and do what is best for the game.  And if you think that is cutting the shield season, then perhaps it is you who is not best for the game, and you should trot off into the commercial world to re-brand some breakfast cereal.

Yours truly,

Jrod

You may remember when he got drunk, crashed his car a few times and attacked a police officer, well in Perth that means you get an extraordinary driver’s license of four days a week.

If you beat the cop to death, you can only drive 2 days a week.

Harsh, but fair.

The magistrate was worried that by taking his license away he would suffer hardship.

If you drive that drunk you probably deserve some fucken hardship.

Little known fact, in Perth they have no taxis.

They do have public transport, but Luke doesn’t know how to use it.

He actually said that, out loud, to people. WAy to get the public sympathising with you, Luke.

He hasn’t caught a bus since high school, and as well all know public transport has changed so much in the last 7 years, they have hoverbuses now and you have to know the secret code word to get on.

I like Luke Pomersbach as a batsman, and I hope he comes back from his troubles, but come on, it’s a bus, that lady who spits in plastic bags has worked it out.

When I was young i caught a train to the bus, and then walked, took me about 70 minutes on a good day.

If any future cricketers fail to get an extraordinary license I can come over as a consultant, am happy to do so.

Australian teams guarded their teams like Jesse with his last bourbon.

Those times are changing, and Lalit Modi is a motivating factor.

Last year there were two overseas players in Shield cricket, Younis Khan for South Australia, who was really there as a batting coach, and Darren Eyelids Pattinson, who was really there as a roofer.

Then in the Fried Chicken big bash, Umar C Gul, Sohail Tanvir and Prince Brendon McCullum all got games.

Other than Younis’ gig, all of the signings felt a bit last minute and tacked on.

Not this year, Victoria has already signed Dwayne Bravo for their t20 team, and if the rumour is true, the women of Sydney are about to get a taste of Afridi this summer.

Lukcy them.

I would be surprised if every state doesn’t pick up a player.

Being that Tasmania is a bit budget, they might only be able to afford Aaron Redmond, but the others can get real internationals.

There is big money in this for the players, no state can afford IPL or County money upfront, but you are a 1 in 3 chance of making the Champion’s league, which is when the real money comes in.

Dwayne Bravo is currently on the players we hate list, but when he plays for Victoria we are willing to change him to the players we like, unless he plays shit, then he goes back, or if he becomes mates with Brad Hodge.

Um, maybe Shaun Tait.

South Australia will have a full strength side, which for them still isn’t much.

Last year there best player was Ryan Harris, who is in Queensland now.

Gillespie, Blewett, Elliott, and Lehmann are all gone.

So is Nathan Adcock, but thats a good thing.

Hard to see them getting to much better, they went on a huge recruiting drive and all the ended up with was two fringe players from Victoria and a bunch of players barely in the squad in NSWales.

Leadership

Well after the leadership debacle that was Nathan Adcock South Australia have picked the logical option.

Graham Manou isn’t going to be dropped, and last year was probably the best batsman, and second best player behind Harris.

Good leader, but probably not the best captain going around.

Bowling

A full year of Shaun Tait will be handy. Only a handful of state cricketers have ever taken over 70 wickets in a year and he is one.

Guys like Rofe, Wise and Clearly are all just state players, and none of which are match winning bowlers.

The two Cullens, Bailey and Daniel, are still around. Wouldn’t be great if one of them took wickets this year.

Batting

The two imports, Younis Khan and Michel Klinger, will probably be the best two batsman in this side.

They might have issues though, one being a muslim, and one being a jew. Throw in Christian at 5, an aboriginal, and you have the minority middle order.

Mark Cosgrove is the only other batsman who is legit. So he becomes mega important, especially when Khan goes home.

Their top order is so fragile, that they might have to take drastic measures and play Michael Vaughan after Younis Khan pisses off.

As if buying Klinger wasn’t embarrassing enough.

Long in the tooth

If this isn’t Paul Rofe’s last year, South Australia will be shit for at least two more years.

Ready to shed the nappies

No real young players who inspire me with confidence, but I am a big fan of Daniel Christian, a batting all rounder who bowls into the 140’s.

Nostradamus

Shield

5th.

One day

5th.

2020

4th.

The rub

They were rubbish last year, but they will have to improve, wont they?

The Hayden Christensen XI