I knew the Shahid Afridi captaincy would end in tears, but I expected them to be tears of blood or disappointment, not joy.
How has this magnificent clown managed to sloggle together two hundreds in three matches? Magic, voodoo, Tony Robbins? There must be a secret because in the 293 games before that he only managed four hundreds, and he hasn’t managed one since 05. So 2 in 3 is pretty good.
While Shahid would be a great, yet creepy, child’s magician, I doubt he knows magic. Voodoo would be more his thing, but he’d soon get bored if the results didn’t come in. And I can’t imagine any Tony Robbin’s conference that Shahid was at where he is able to sit down for more than 30 seconds.
No this current madness can be explained with the words leadership.
Afridi might still practice the ancient art of drunk sailor batting, but he is a functioning alcoholic who now feels he needs to score.
Against Sri Lanka he bundled the whole shithouse batting line up into a rucksack and popped them onto his shoulder while he scared Sri Lanka senseless. Against Bangladesh his teammates were more effective, but Shahid still did the business to ensure that Pakistan actually won a game of cricket.
For a man who has spent his entire career being an accidental fancy fixing allegation, he is now in danger of actually being a cricketer who can, dare I say it, be relied upon.
I saw a little of his innings against Sri Lanka, and there was that look in his eye that good captains get. The “I’ll fucken rip my mothers eye balls out and stick them up my own ass before I’ll lose this game” look.
Usually Shahid has the look of a lost horny and excitable puppy.
Could his reign as captain turn him into the happy go lucky assassin? I do hope so.
Afridi’s second hundred was like Halley’s Comet coming around a week after it had just arrived. Except the comet actually had a bunch of girls called Hayley playing beach volleyball, drinking Mountain Dew and Vodka (known as Goat’s piss) and dancing to Michael Franti tunes.
There is the massive possibility that Afridi’s reign might still end in the bad kind of tears. That is what is great about him, because when he took over as captain, no one expected him to start hitting consistent runs, they expected something just as weird, but involving embarrassment.