“Take a dash of Saeed Ajmal.
A Michael Hussey.
Make sure you mix both with a game that for the first time in a long time Pakistan can win.
It helps if the game is a final, especially one that Pakistan have dominated from the third over in the first innings until the 18th over of the second innings.
Then just fly a plane over Pakistan and drop a bunch of razor blades.”
It is just that simple.
Had Australia lost, the Australian suicide kit would have been simple, just a copy of Michael Clarke batting on a loop, and then the Australians would have broken their own necks.
Instead it is Pakistanis who are thinking of offing themselves, and with good measure.
The Pakistani team didn’t just lose, they broke up with their fans last week, then wooed them back with romantic gestures and a promise of a beautiful life together. Then they only go and sleep with 3 transsexual prostitutes the night before the wedding.
It was more than tragic.
There is something special about Pakistan. They don’t just lose, they take it to a whole new level, some sort of Greek tragedy directed by Takashi Miike.
48 runs from 2.5 overs with 3 wickets in hand. You shouldn’t lose a game of cricket from that position, you shouldn’t lose with a ball to spare, you just fucken shouldn’t.
Mike Hussey’s form was wrist splittingly good.
60 off 24 balls.
Even when he was a statistical anomaly he would have struggled to do anything this good.
Ofcourse there was the normal ice cold finish and the eager beaver twos, but the sixes.
Oh the sixes. Everyone was a punch to a Pakistani kid’s grandmother, in the throat.
There were so many sixes. I gave up counting, but I am sure the average grandmother took some hell of a beating.
In the past I’ve had a fair bit to say about M Hussey, mostly about his test form, well, almost exclusively about his test form, but this was fucking amazing. For a player to step up and do that at that stage in a semi final was just off the charts. Ofcourse he may have kept his test spot for life and ensured that Michael Clarke is the next Australian captain. But his heart was in the right place.
I was so excited I was going to give him a Natalie Portman, and I only give them out for truly special performances, but I didn’t think Mike Hussey would be a fan of Portman.
So here is a Molly, as I see her as more his style.
Well done Mr Hussey, today you have ended the life of many Pakistani fans and inspired me to give you a Molly Ringwald.
Look how happy Molly is, she has always said that while Saeed Ajmal is a good bowler, he can be hittable at times.
“He-Goatsong” directed by Miike would be mint.
The Bible has to be re-written. 666 – the number of The Muss!!!!
.-= Wes´s last blog ..Australia: alive! Supporters: dead! =-.
Every word you wrote, I agree with….
I’m just gonna pathetically rant here since getting a therapist is expensive.
No1 has to care..i just want to let it out so I don’t keep it in, go crazy, and end up killing someone’s pet kitten.
I was sooo sure they’d win and my dad was calling me up from across the world….all jubilant and excited. And me + my friends + cousins had made a billion trillion prayers for them. And I bet every Pak fan had… And it was a really exciting match cuz both sides weren’t giving in..
EVEN THE WEATHER WAS COMPLYING…..it could easily have been a washout, but the rain stopped in time…the batting was beautiful….the bowling too….and then they went and DIED.
It was the saddest stupidest thing i ever witnessed in my entire life.
At the end of the day, Australia deserved it. They really wanted it and worked for it aggressively and perfectly. Their team is good…………….
If Afridi wasn’t captain, and it was someone annoying like Misbah, i wouldn’t even mind.
I dont know why, but I feel like Afridi is some kind of blood relative…
But Afridi..and Aamer…and the Akmals….all doing so well…
The possibility that the team might win the T20 cup for the SECOND time in a row…that everything would be sweet and dandy and there’d be dancing in the streets….
And then Pakistan just DIED. Not even a soft death, a gruesome one with organs exploding everywhere.
I’m so sadddd…
P.S. Wouldn’t Miranda Kerr be more Hussey’s type?
I just burst into maniac laughter at the end of match! Spinner in the last over topped all of Dhoni’s smart decisions in this tournament and then some! lol!!
Has to be cricket’s KLPD of the year!
Oh wait! The Sydney Test was only played recently. That makes it 2 KLPs for the year.
a Miike reference. Nice. helluva quicker collapse than the last 20 minutes of “Audition”
KLPD….fucking brilliant! I’m a Indian and I almost felt bad for Pakistan….key word almost!
No one should lose from a situation like such but no one should consider the Aussies done till the last mound of earth is spread and the’re six feet under. The odds by the second last over were 95% in Pakistan’s favor and yet the Aussies found a reason to sing Under The Southern Cross i Stand. Hats off to you, you bloody bastards!
P.S- Can Cricket Australia kindly let the current players play in the IPL so that some of this rabid determination to winning can rub off on our overpaid, under-performing, almost obese “cricketers”? And maybe then they might feel the other kind of hunger.
I think Game was lost at the end of Aamer’s over .. he was faster bowler… who should have gone for less runs ..
Btw. this is to all Pakistani supporter
1) Aus haven’t done this shyyt first time so don’t be sad
2) Make sure you don’t take out anger on someone else or some where else
3) there will be plenty of chances in whole life to cheer and dance for victory
4) so don’t blast yourself
5) Mike Hussey is not a human, he is an Android
6) White is the biggest bear who knows how to play cricket
7) Clarke got out earlier than expected
8) God doesn’t help anyone who doesn’t help themselves, so stop blaming God .. because he can’t poop or clean poop for you, also stop giving credit to God .. give credit to Akmals Salman Aamer Rehman Ajmal and may be Afridi who put team this far and gave their best
9) Its just a silly game
10) Cricket is the best game always remember that.
11) Its never over until its over in Cricket.
12) Still go out there and celebrate that our team just constipated most of the Australians
I love how so many Pakis see an absolute cunthead (and what’s more, a two-time cheat) like Afridi as (a) a good captain and (b) some sort of hero. I mean I knew, the moment ol’ Chomp Chomp struck his ‘I am God’ pose after getting that wicket, that the cunthead was going to mess it up.
Unlike T20 2009, when he was God, scoring runs and taking wickets, he’s had perhaps just one moment of significance in this tournament. Wait… make that two — and the decision to bowl Ajmal in that last over was the more significant of the two.
Yawn, more like a KLPLC — Lathi Charge.
No mention of Ajmal making US$250K on that last over?
BTW KLPD is short for Khade Lund Pe Dhoka. For all non-Hindi speakers this translates literally to “Betrayal of an erect dick”
I truly feel sorry for Pakistani supporters. Deep down I probably thought this game was theirs – almost from the second over where Kamaran and Salman had shown so much restraint. Kept their wickets, didn’t hit out wildly, choose to build for later rather than self-destruct.
Occasionally I felt Oz might have had a chance, I know these guys in yellow tabards don’t usually give up so they just might be able to pull themselves out of a hole ‘yea’ big. Then my budding optimism stuffed into that hole by uncharacteristic poor fielding, ineffective bowling. The hole getting deeper and darker. A ‘stani six would be thwacked, a mishit would land in open ground or an Australian wicket would fall.
I became resigned to have a bit more of that emotion I felt after The Oval in 09. Not good but that’s OK. I have only relatively recently come into to this world of grown adults hitting bits of cow and tree with another bit of a different tree and I was sort of looking for an excuse to spend less time with cricket. Maybe I’d watch until the Ashes series and mark it all down to a period of temporary infatuation. But no, I should really call it a day after this one and only watch the Ashes which brought me to this world in the first place.
How the fuck I am supposed to put this stuff behind me now? I cancelled my skyplayer sub (it’s supposed to expire tomorrow after the final) due to my decision to spend less time with this game. Game. Thinking I will get some work done if there’s no match running in the corner of my screen.
Jebus on a postage stamp. The Oz players winning that game for me gave me the biggest buzz since I stopped smoking crack. I might as well declare my career over now.
Unbeliveable. I had them written off too. But it just goes to show that you can’t write Australia off in T20, that’s twice in this tournament that they have gotten themselves out of the brown stuff. Against Sri Lanka Aus were 67-5 (Thats 5-67 Aussie fact fans) with three overs of Malinga yet to be bowled and still managed to build a huge score thanks to Cameron White.
However, from what I have seen, some of Pakistan’s bowling at the death and field placings were not the smartest cricket, I would be surprised if England made the same errors given the same match situation.
For all of the talk of the T20 game, due to its brevity, throwing up more surprises the two best sides at this tournament have made the final. Which tells us two things:
1. That sides are taking T20 seriously, have game plans, specialist players and tactics to get them results.
2. That the IPL really was a load of overlong, over-commercialised nonsense which counts for very little.
I may never actually get around to believing that the Aussies (By Aussies, I mean Mike Hussey resuscitating a nearly dead carcus in a swamp and hauling it out with his teeth on to the bank) did that. They’ve pulled some real escape artist jobs in their time, but really…
Is this the same Hussey that was sitting on the benches for CSK when Hayden was struggling to middle the ball
so we agree that it was fixed? or is ajmal really that bad?!
Afridi may be a cunt head but I’d add magnificent to that
Sure he’s had a slow series- but maybe he’s saving himself – something
a catholic raised boy like me can appreciate
Finally figured out that I like 20 20 just don’t think much of the ipl
Started with the lankans magic win with an Icc maximum off the last
ball
Continued when south african capitulation made me angry – and I fucken
hate the saffas
Finally the whole 2 nd innings of the 2nd semi
With the last partnership the cream on the cake
Like a 30 min wank after finishing an 18 hr shift where In spite of
lactic buildup and exhaustion you refuse to lose faith in the
possibility of a happy
ending
At times excruciating but slept well
Afridi may be a cunt head but I’d add magnificent to that
Sure he’s had a slow series- but maybe he’s saving himself – something
a catholic raised boy like me can appreciate
Finally figured out that I like 20 20 just don’t think much of the ipl
Started with the lankans magic win with an Icc maximum off the last
ball
Continued when south african capitulation made me angry – and I fucken
hate the saffas
Finally the whole 2 nd innings of the 2nd semi
With the last partnership the cream on the cake
Like a 30 min wank after finishing an 18 hr shift where In spite of
lactic buildup and exhaustion you refuse to lose faith in the
possibility of a happy
ending
At times excruciating but slept well