KP does improv

“If we play like we played this week, we’ll beat Australia”
KP

He didn’t really say it, did he?

I mean why would you?

He poked the bear.

Just leave it alone.

Dance around it.

Shut the fuck up.

Graeme Smith poked the bear last time, and it stood on him.

Better to just play good cricket when the time comes.

As generally that is how you win cricket matches.

The comment should have been, “we showed good signs this week, and if we keep improving like this, there is no side that can beat us”.

No side.

Not just one.

Stop putting all your eggs in the Ashes basket you stupid fucks, test cricket is a world game, not a persoanl grudge match between England and Australia.

I would expect that a South African may have noticed this.

By next Ashes, Sri Lanka could be the best side in world cricket, and South Africa could beat Australia at home.

The Ashes are a figment of your imagination KP.

India is real.

The West Indies is a possibility.

Sri Lanka is a dream.

The Ashes won’t seem winnable if you lose the next 3 fucken series.

What have you won as captain?

A dead rubber test.

Whoop dee fucken do.

If you can’t beat India or Sri Lanka, why would you care if you can win the ashes, you’ll still be ranked about 4th in the world by then.

And why give any ammunition to Australia.

They are marginally better than an average side.

But by next year, this may not be the case.

Next year they might have 4 bowlers who can take test wickets, and their newer players will be established test players.

And Don’t lie to me KP, i was fucken there.

If you played like that against Australia, especially an Australia who may be reeling from losing at least one test series, possibly at home, you would be clobbered.

You played better cricket than you have all summer, but you played it against a team in pina colada mode.

Don’t mistake a bowl of goats piss for a bottle of champagne.

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0 thoughts on “KP does improv

  1. Miriam says:

    I’m just relieved that he managed to hold back from saying that England would win 5-0.

  2. Ceci says:

    KP=Greig – both wanky bastards

  3. SarahCanterbury says:

    I think you summed that up pretty well there, JRod. Idiot KP.

  4. Samir Chopra says:

    KP is such an insecure dude. That Ashes line was the next thing after the tattoo. Next thing you know, he’ll be lining up to have the Queen’s mug tattooed on his arse. Or his first-born’s.

  5. Leg Break says:

    South Africa in Pina Colada mode.Have you gone mad since you got over to UK? SA with Pina Colada???!!!Possibly, just possiby, SA in Castle beer mode.But SA and Pina Colada do just not go

  6. Naked Cricket says:

    he needs an audit, KPMG comes to mind.

  7. A P Webster says:

    Leg Break,Maybe South Africa gre to like Pina Coladas after getting caught in the rain during the English ‘Summer’?

  8. Dave says:

    Don’t give him ideas, Miriam!

  9. Damith S. says:

    The bear has officially been stirredhttp://www.cricinfo.com/australia/content/current/story/364847.html

  10. Jrod says:

    Damith, trust me Neilsen is not the bear.

  11. Soulberry says:

    Hey, he’s had the desired effect…Australia (read CWB…The land of Oz begins and ends here) now so badly wants do do his captaincy in now, maybe they slip up on the bolo punch eh and leave their chin exposed?

  12. Damith S. says:

    Well Jrod, after 06 I hope Neilsen is the only one that does the stirring.

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