I have spent a bit of time Bagging James Anderson.
Not enough I think.
Some of this is based on his cricket ability, a lot of this is based on his confidence in those abilities.
Some may say, and I am saying, he slightly overestimates those abilities.
After 24 tests his average is 37.
As I speak, he has taken his 6th wicket today.
Mitchell Johnson, whom I have called to be dropped for at least 5 of the 8 tests he has played in, has an average of 34.
So an article on Jimmy Anderson is overdue.
Anderson does have talent.
When it’s his day, ie: the ball is swinging, and he just got some lovin from the missus, he is nigh on unplayable.
But how many of these days are there if his average is about 37, including this little destoyation I am trying not to witness at the moment.
New Zealand are getting such a full on pasting from the boy, David Gower is wondering if he will get all 10 wickets.
David Gower has obviously been drinking absinthe, but that is the thing with Anderson, when he is on fire, there are few more devastating than he.
Of course his detractors, when not bagging his pretty boy features, will say when he is not on fire he is like fucking a 3 month old Atlantic Salmon.
Being a natural journalistic animal I did research to see who was right his fans, or the Atlantic Salmon haters.
In half of his test matches he has failed to get 3 wickets in the whole match.
That is all sorts of awful.
He has also never taken more than 7 wickets in a match, which for a new ball bowler is pretty shoddy.
But my research, I know, shows that when he does take wickets, he takes em in groups of 4 and 5.
And if he is ever going to take more than 7 it’s this game where he has 6 with a possible 14 in the stands.
And he is like 25, so there is hope.
I have always thought of him as someone who strolls through life being talented and pretty and not backing it up.
According to my research half the time I am spot on, the other times I’m a playa hater.
This has not always been the case, before the tour of New Zealand I generally ignored him as I thought he’d be dropped forever soon.
He hasn’t and if anything is now the number 2 bowler picked.
But I don’t like him now.
I took real offence to it when he had a go at Jesse Ryder in his debut innings.
Seemed unnecessary and over the top for a dude who has been in the system for this long without “making it”.
So Jimmy your test career may be just turning into a beautiful flower, but you have made my list.
You forgot the one thing that always stood out about Jimmy for me… he bowls the most sublime half-volleys known to man. It’s as if he’s delivering it specifically to each bastman, tailor-made to their considerations, so they can each fill a highlight-reel full cover drives to the boundary. In fact, am Anderson half-volley during the World Cup inspired one of my very first posts: http://outsidetheline.typepad.com/outside_the_line/2007/03/james_and_the_g.html
I agree with pretty much everything you say about him, Jrod. I also thought he should be dropped. That said, Jimmy is pretty hot and if he can turn in more performances like today’s, he will only get hotter. He seems very shy and has a vulnerability about him too, which is extremely appealing. I suppose that is a very girly, non crickety post. Oh well.
All those words Sarah, yet you said nothing… aww.I still say drop the bland bugger too. If I’ve learnt anything around these parts it’s to take the long view. whatever he’s done today doesn’t change what he didn’t do in the previous tests.Obviously he’ll at least start the series against the Saffers without doubt, but there’s no real reason to think he’ll be repeating this performance any time soon…
I said he was hot… Arguably it may not have been my most insightful comment but I’ve been sitting in the rain all day watching cricketers wave, eat and chat on their mobiles. That’s completely irrelevant I know. I think my brain is in sleep mode.
So you were basically just stalking your own work colleagues?
Dunno about Gower on absinthe, but Boycott was on something today. Leching after Shilpa Shetty, lusting after the young Nepalese boy who took 10 wickets the other week, and obsessing about pop music and brass bands.It was all very disturbing. Almost as disturbing as Jimmy was for the Kiwis.
I think it’s fair to say they wouldn’t exactly describe me as a work colleague… though quite a few do know my name, which is nice.So, Spigot, when you go to a cricket match are you there to stalk the players too? Because of course that would be the only reason for a female to go to a game of cricket, now wouldn’t it??
In response to Sarah and her point about why females may go to cricket. I would say.If I was something of a misogynistic bastard, that they would go to stalk the players and watch them for more than just cricket. But I’m not, so that’s good.
Ah yeah mimi, I heard part of that, the Shetty bit, Boycott is one comical guy, eh?
I think Jim is fab – and he thinks I am funny so narr narr narr narr.*possibly not my most adult post*
Joking aside, Anderson is something of an enigma. Lethal and more so than most other bowlers when the ball swings but on a hot sunny day on a wicket where you need to put a bit more in, he doesn’t run through teams, he doesn’t get many (if any) wickets and furthermore, he can quite easily on said days get taken to the cleaners. A’la Napier.
@ Sarah – Surely, surely, surely (this is coming from a hetrosexual bloke here) Brett Lee is a better looker than Jimmy. And Binga even gets amoung the wickets a lot more – two for one!As mentioned by others, when the balls zipping around JA can do the job. The big test for him will be against SAffers.
Flynn was dismissed at 2:30.
Currycricketer – I think Jimmy is hotter (I tend to go for dark haired men) but would probably go for Brett Lee as an overall package – his Bollywood vid is fab and I love that he can laugh at himself. Plus he is an awesome bowler in all conditions. I fear Jimmy will be rubbish against the Saffers but live in hope of being wrong. Oh and for the record, chaps, I started going to local Saturday/Sunday league games when I was 7 and went to my first Kent game at the age of 12. I was the scorer for the local boy’s team at 14 and later on for a work team. I go to matches because I love the game and would do so even if everyone looked like Kallis (though probably wouldn’t then use a long lens on my camera!). The fact that some of the cricketers are hot is rather lovely bonus!
Sarah, I didn’t say anything about you being female… Anyone who spends a day watching a group of people wave and eat sandwiches is either loopy, or watching big brother on E4 (and therefore stupid and loopy)
Haha! Ok, loopy I’ll own up to, though there were a fair few of us who hung around until play was officially abandoned for the day. Stupid, no! Detest Big Brother. Have not watched a second of it yet and have no intention of doing so.