Sydney = sooks & bullies

I think I’ve worked out exactly what is wrong with Australia Vs India relations.

Sydney.

The test series was fine, then Sydney came along, Australia started claiming one hand one bouncers, Bucknor found out Roy was his long lost son, Anil Kumble lost his frame of reference, Bhaji and Roy danced orally and Ishant Sharma “accidentally” got his gloves confused.

Then world war three started, it was like a particularly bad Bollywood film, without songs, pretty girls, terrible acting or happy endings.

Finally when bastard monkeys and Ricky Ponting’s honour was no longer in question we started playing cricket in other states.

The BCCI decided that the tour could continue, and the test series was completed.

Then Sri Lanka came out, no one could make runs, everyone except the batsmen seemed quite happy.

Then a meaningless one dayer in Sydney was played.

Dhoni used illegal gloves, Sharma asked Roy to gently fu©k off and the Australians are bullies again.

I don’t blame Dhoni for using illegal gloves.

I don’t blame Sharma for losing the plot.

And I don’t blame the Aussies for sledging until the Indian’s got caught retaliating.

I blame Sydney.

Not the BCCi and their sooky lala behaviour.

Not Andrew Symonds and his well bowled mates.

Sydney, it can take non sooks and non bullies and make them Indians and Australians.

Tony Greig lives there.

Think of all the people who have been to Sydney and died, Kurt Cobain, John Lennon and Burt Reynolds.

Also Tom Cruise likes Sydney.

The defence rests your honour.

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0 thoughts on “Sydney = sooks & bullies

  1. miriam says:

    What is this word “sook”?

  2. Tony says:

    Dunno if Burt Reynolds is dead, but despite the odd role his career died somewhere around Cannonball Run II.

  3. Jrod says:

    Well he looked dead in the latest remake of the longest yard. 2. sook to sulk, crack a sad and act like a big fat baby when you don’t get your own way.sam had a sook when claire wouldn’t sleep with him.

  4. miriam says:

    That is what the judge would say to you: “What is this ‘sook’”? “Who is this Kurt Cobain?”.

  5. Homer says:

    and what is a dummy spit?can u put together a list of australianisms so that the rest of us can understand what is being said?Cheers

  6. Straight Point says:

    roy just cracked the joke of year when he said he only said “well bowl mate” !!

  7. Q says:

    Miriam – theres a new word for scrabble ;-)Uncle J – very intriguing abt Sydney. There’s something in the water or the breakfast served at the hotel.

  8. Miss Field says:

    To spit the dummy is to have a tantrum. Surely we aren’t the only ones to use the word sook though?!?! It’s a beautiful word!

  9. Ottayan says:

    Put it down to the fact Tom Cruise likes Sydney.

  10. Tony says:

    Straight: He said “Good ball, champ” but he was being ever so mildly sarcastic.

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