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Some times I wonder why cricket needs its Administracrats.
Surely a trained monkey (non racist monkey reference) with a crayon could make fewer errors.
But then they say something that makes me sit up and listen.
“Test cricket is what is being played, it is not tiddlywinks.”
Says head Cricket Australian Administracrat James “I was never much chop as a bowler” Sutherland.
Brilliant observation, tiddlywinks is an indoor game played with sets of small discs called “winks” lying on a surface, usually a flat mat. Players use a larger disc called a “squidger” to pop a wink into flight by pressing down on one side of the wink. The objective of the game is to cause the winks to land either on top of opponents’ winks, or ultimately inside a pot or cup.
The main point of difference I can see between cricket and Tiddlywinks is that it’s not played over 5 days.
The North American Tiddlywinks Association have hired slander experts to see if James Sutherland was attacking their great game by mentioning it in the same sentence as cricket.
However Rick(y) & Anil have played tiddlywinks before, it ended up in controversy at a hotel in Jamaica. Anil suggested Rick(y) had played an illegal flop womp move and accused him of not playing in the spirit of the winks. He demanded that the concierge come in and sort the mess out. Rick(y) got very defensive and suggested that his flop womp was not in question and smacked the concierge with a chair for questioning him about it, or any sneaky carnovsky plays from earlier in the game.
Hitting someone with a chair in Tiddlywinks is called a Boondock and gets you three squops.
A tremendous brouhaha ensued.
And for those who think I made up all these words and are questioning my integrity, visit Tiddlywinks wiki page if you don’t believe me.
Also, If you are questioning my integrity, then you should not be here, someone hand me a chair so I can smack you upside your head, you dirty integrity doubter.
I hereby declare you the winner of the Internet.You can all stop now.
The Taming of the CrewAct II Scene IIIPonting: Maybe you shouldn’t be hereIndian press guy: Maybe you shouldnt’t be herePonting: Maybe you shouldn’t be hereIndian press guy: Maybe you shouldnt’t be here(Conversation continues in the same vein as curtains come down)
Being English, I always find it hard to explain to Americans that tiddlywinks is a well respected international sport. I was never much good at it. I kept blinding the cat. Which is similar to my cricket career.
1) HANG ON A SEC: Suave, you declared ME the winner of the internet a little while ago. Do I have to cede my crown so soon?2) If only the North American Tiddlywinks Association could be called the North American Tiddlywinks Organisation. Actually I bet they tried that already.
Did I not tell you that it’s like an employee of the month award. Sorry, my bad!!You were champion for December, Uncle J Rod is January’s.
Three Squops to you then…I quite like these terms…sound as if they are straight out of LOR or ‘arry Potter.Squops…that’s good isn’t it? Boondocks sounds suspiciously familiar…I believe they began as temporary places to ease one’s person…no, that’s bondoocks I think.
Boondocks actually originates from a Philippine word (bundok) meaning mountain or in-hospitable/remote place..I googled that, cos i’s a clever fella..
Are you sure its not a term based on the film boondock saints, about boston’s guardian angels.
No, no site for me. I just like to bother other people. My December internet prize was just for a comment I once made. Like olympic medals (apparently), prizes were easier to win in the old days.